-If you dig deep enough beneath the surface you may be surprised by what you might find…..
CHAPTER-1
Your Life My Life
Tawanna frowned as she watched her daughter admiring her outfit in the large full body mirror.
“That do not look good on you. Take that off and put on the dress I laid out for you. It looks much better than that shit you got on right now.”
Alie looked at her mother through the mirror and rolled her eyes. Her mom always pulled this kind of stuff on her. She always acted like she didn’t have taste. Or everything she did was obviously so wrong in some kind of a way. She was always very blunt about it too. It made Alie insecure at times. It made her feel stupid, even though she knew she wasn’t. Alie graduated at the top of her class four years ago and would’ve easily got into any college she wanted, but she didn’t want to go to college. Alie wanted to pursue her dreams. If she would’ve known that pursuing her dreams would’ve meant having to deal with her mother on a daily basis she would have went away to college in a heartbeat just to put some distance between herself and her mother. It wasn’t because she didn’t love her, Alie loved her mother dearly and she appreciated all of the sacrifices Tawanna had made for her over the years. The reason that she wanted to get away from her mother for a while was for the exact thing that she was doing right now….being over the top with everything. Tawanna could have just as easily said what she had to say in a nicer way. It seemed like she never considered Alie’s feelings when she talked to her. Alie never said anything about the way Tawanna’s bluntness with words made her feel, she simply acted like it didn’t bother her just like she was doing right now. Alie grabbed the dress off of the bed and walked into the bathroom to try it on.
Tawanna shook her head as she watched Alie walk into the bathroom with the dress. She wondered what the hell was wrong with her only child? She walked around here with a natural body that most women would probably be glad to pay thousands of dollars for, and she always wanted to dress like a damn boy. No matter how hard she tried, Tawanna just couldn’t understand what Alie was thinking at times. Alie did not appreciate the looks or body that she was blessed with and she definitely did not understand the power that her pussy was packin’. Tawanna shook her head again as she thought about how naive Alie was to life.
“If I was her age and had her talent I would be on tour with Beyonce right now!”
Tawanna smirked. She honestly believed what she’d just said. Tawanna had never been the type to be shy about using what she had to get what she wanted. That was mostly how she got Alie’s career to where it was at today. Alie wasn’t on the mainstream level yet, hell she wasn’t even all that known locally, but because of Tawanna she’d met some power players at the local radio stations and local record producers. Tawanna had made that happen primarily by sleeping with a bunch of people. Alie had a big voice and much personality when she was performing on stage, but in real life Alie was very shy. Tawanna was the total opposite. Tawanna was the life of the party everywhere she went. It would be a hard job to find a picture of Tawanna without some sort of drink in her hand. Tawanna was enjoying her life. She was enjoying Alie’s life too. Tawanna was living out the life she’d always dreamed of having through her daughter. Why shouldn’t she? Tawanna loved her daughter to death, but she was sure that if she had not had Alie at such a young age her life would have been much different……
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Tawanna Richardson was born in Chester P.A. She was the youngest of five siblings. All boys except for her. Tawanna never knew her father and neither did her brothers. Because they had no real father figure in their lives, Tawanna’s brothers were always very protective of their only sister. They also took it upon themselves to make sure they made her hard enough to face the world that was out there waiting for her. Tawanna learned how to fight by the time she was eight years old, after constantly getting beat up by her older brothers. By the time she was ten years old she was in the streets fighting and beating up boys as old as sixteen. To no one’s surprise, Tawanna was a rough and rugged tomboy. Her tomboy faze didn’t last long though. At twelve years old Tawanna became very interested in boys. Tawanna was a cute little girl and all of the little boys loved her. She quickly noticed that boys would do anything to get her attention. They gave her candy, potato chips, and all kinds of snacks just for a little bit of her time and attention. Tawanna wondered what she could get out of the little boys if she kissed a few of them. She began receiving perfumes and flowers from the little boys every day. They fought with one another each day in hopes of being the lucky one who would get to be the one to walk Tawanna home from school, in hopes that they could get another kiss on the way. The little boy who managed to fight all of the others off and be the lucky one to walk her home, quickly learned that he wasn’t so lucky once he got to her house. Tawanna’s brothers beat the hell out of the little boy. Once the other little boys at the school got wind of what was waiting for them at Tawanna’s house, they stopped fighting to walk her home. Eventually she stopped getting any kind of attention from the little boys altogether. She was cute and all, but the little boys didn’t see her cuteness as a good enough reason to get the shit beat out of them. Especially not just for a kiss. Tawanna missed the attention that she used to get from the boys and she desperately wanted it back. Tawanna learned two things. 1) Never bring her boyfriends to the house and 2) It was going to take more than a kiss to get constant attention from boys. Tawanna lost her virginity to a 15 year old boy named Chuckie two weeks before her 13th birthday. She found that having sex was a lot different than kissing boys. Having sex made her catch feelings. Tawanna was in love with Chuckie after they had sex. She assumed he was her boyfriend. She quickly realized that she really liked sex and she wanted to do it all the time with Chuckie. Being as though Chuckie had no problem at all with this, Tawanna made the mistake of thinking that sex every day meant that they were in a relationship. She got her little heart broke when she saw Chuckie in the store with another girl. When Tawanna tried to speak to him he acted as if he didn’t know her. Tawanna was crushed and mad. She wanted revenge. Tawanna turned to her brothers. She didn’t tell them that she’d been having sex with Chuckie. She simply told them that Chuckie tried to feel her butt on the way home from school. That was enough to get them to commence to whipping on Chuckie’s ass something fierce. Tawanna’s mother and brothers assumed that Tawanna was a good girl and still a virgin.
After her first bout with heartbreak Tawanna changed. Tawanna still really liked sex, but she learned to seperate her feelings from a moment of pleasure. She had no problem with having sex with a boy one day, then never speaking to them again or talking about it afterward. The only problem with that was, little boys weren’t as discreet about sex as she was. They couldn’t wait to let the whole world know that they’d got themselves some sex. Word spread around town that Tawanna was an easy lay and she started getting the attention she’d always wanted. She even had high school boys trying to get with her and she was only in the 8th grade at the time. The minute that she started having sex with high school boys was when her problems started. Her older brothers got a wiff of what was being said about their little sister. They went through the whole school beating up everyone who said they slept with their little sister. Tawanna’s brothers soon found out that the rumors about Tawanna were true, when one of her brothers caught her having sex with a boy from the high school in the bathroom of the playground. Tawanna’s relationship with her brothers was never the same after that day. She’d embarrassed them in the worst kind of way. They basically turned their backs on her. As far as they were concerned she had no brothers. Tawanna’s mother was upset with her too. She could see that her daughter was headed down the same path she’d took as a young woman, and she didn’t like it one bit. She partially blamed herself for this because she’d never had a steady man in her kid’s life. It seemed like she’d had a different man living with her every week since her kids were very young. As for Tawanna, she kept having sex with the high school boys until the summer that she turned 14. Tawanna’s body had magically transformed over the summer. If a man overlooked her baby face(which most grown men did) Tawanna could easily pass for a young woman in her early twenties. Tawanna started getting approached by grown ass men on a regular basis. Tawanna knew the game. She knew that these much older men didn’t want anything from her except sex. Knowing that didn’t stop her from giving it to them. They only wanted one thing from Tawanna, and Tawanna only wanted one thing from them. She had no problem at all giving the men what they wanted, but it was definitely going to cost them. When she was in elementary school she accepted gifts of flowers, candy, and perfumes from the little boys. This wasn’t elementary school anymore, and her time and body was going to cost a person much more than those childish things. Tawanna could have easily had fifty boyfriends if she wanted, but she settled on three. She had a twenty two year old boyfriend who went to Penn State and played on the football team, a twenty four year old big time drug dealer from Philly, and a fourty five year old white boyfriend who just happened to be one of the teachers at the local high school. Tawanna could get anything she wanted at anytime from her three older boyfriends. Tawanna, in her young state of mind didn’t want anything except jewelery and clothes. She had plenty of both too. Tawanna started high school that fall. She went to school fresh to death every day. She had all the latest clothes and all of the gold earings, bracelets, and rings a person could ever dream of having. She laughed at the high school boys who tried to get with her now. High school boys weren’t in her league anymore. They didn’t have their own house, car, or money. What the hell could they possibly do for her? By this time all of Tawanna’s brothers were out of the house. Two were away at college and the other two lived with their girlfriends. It was only Tawanna, her mother, and her mom’s latest boyfriend of the month Tommy living at the house. Tawanna couldn’t understand why her mom was with him. He was ugly and he was broke. Tommy was about the same age as Tawanna’s boyfriend”The Teacher.” Tommy was on Tawanna from the first time he stepped foot inside the house. Tawanna noticed, but she was far from interested in Tommy, he was fat and balding. The worst part of it all was that he was broke. He didn’t have a chance in hell of getting his hands on her. All that changed when Tawanna’s mom started drinking heavily. Every night she came home from the bar drunk as hell. When she did, she yelled at Tawanna and smacked her in the face until she passed out drunk. She did this every night. To get back at her mother for treating her like this, Tawanna began parading around the house in a t-shirt and panties whenever Tommy was there and her mother was passed out drunk. She wasn’t going to have sex with him or anything, this was just her little way of getting back at her mother for being a bitch. Knowing that her mom’s boyfriend wanted her so bad bought Tawanna endless amounts of pleasure. Tommy was a willing participant in Tawanna’s game. He was not shy about letting Tawanna know how bad he wanted her. When he was sitting on the couch in the living room watching t.v. and Tawanna came prancing by in her panties and t-shirt, Tommy would reach into his pants and begin to jerk off right there on the couch in front of her. Tawanna never stayed around long enough to watch, she just frowned up her face and kept walking by on her way to and from the kitchen. Tommy managed to get her attention one night as she pranced by in her panties and t-shirt. He grabbed her by the arm as she was walking by.
“I know you wonder why your mom is with me don’t you? Why don’t you let me show you why?”
Tommy stuck out his tongue and wiggled it around with a devilish grin on his face. For some strange reason Tawanna was not repulsed. She was extremely curious to find out why her mother was with the fat ugly man, and she knew exactly what he was insinuating when he stuck his tongue out of his mouth. Tawanna had three older boyfriends and had probably had sex hundreds of times in her young life, but she’d never been eaten out. She was definitely curious. Tawanna had heard many people rant and rave about being ate out. Tawanna decided that she wanted to experience what all the fuss was about first hand. Her mom was upstairs passed out drunk as usual, so getting caught by her wasn’t something she needed to worry about, plus she only planned on doing this with Tommy one time so it wasn’t really like she would be having an affair or relationship with her mother’s man. In Tawanna’s young mind this made perfect sense. She was going to let Tommy eat her out, but she was not going to have sex with him. There was no way in hell she was letting his fat ass climb on top of her. Tawanna laid on the floor and Tommy eagerly pulled her panties off. She shivered with pleasure as Tommy slipped his tongue inside of her. This felt better than she imagined it would. He definitely knew what he was doing. Just when she thought it couldn’t get any better, Tommy slipped his tongue into her ass. Tawanna screamed loudly without even realizing that she had. Tommy had originally agreed with Tawanna that he was only going to eat her out, but now that he had her where he wanted her he took the opportunity to slide himself inside. For a fat man, Tommy moved quickly as he rised up from having his head buried in between her legs to climbing on top of her. Once he got inside of her he pounded away like a mad man. After exactly 12 strokes Tommy was shaking uncontrollably and breathing heavily. He was done. Tawanna closed her eyes and waited for Tommy to get his fat ass off of her. Tawanna heard a loud crash that sounded like thunder. She opened her eyes to see blood running down the side of Tommy’s head. Her mother had come downstairs and bust him over the head with a Vodka bottle. Tommy’s body instantly went limp after the first blow to the head. Tawanna’s mom kept hitting him over the head repeatedly until the bottle broke. Tawanna managed to somehow wiggle herself free from up under the unconscious fat man. She rolled over and got to her feet. Tawanna felt a sharp pain in her arm. Her mother had slashed her across the arm with the broken Vodka bottle and was still swinging wildly. Her mother had a crazed look in her eyes. She screamed incoherent words as she swung the broken bottle at Tawanna and tried to slash her again. Her mother wasn’t her mother anymore. She’d transformed into some kind of a crazed demonic monster. Tawanna was sure that the monster was going to kill her up in here. Tawanna caught another slash, this time to the side of the face as her mother swung away wildly. Tawanna snapped out of the daze she was in before her mom could do any more damage to her. Tawanna managed to escape out the back door before her mom killed her ass up in that joint. She ran down the middle of the street butt-naked. Tawanna ran for five blocks straight until she got to her best friend Malika’s house. It was two o’clock in the morning. Tawanna banged on Malika’s front door like she was the police.
Tawanna escaped from the house of horrors that night, but Tommy didn’t. When Tawanna’s mother realized that she wasn’t going to catch Tawanna,(who would have easily beat Usain Bolt in a race that night) she went back to the house to take care of the still unconscious Tommy. She tied his hands and feet with rope as he laid on the floor knocked out. She threw a pot of boiling hot water on him so he could be woke to see exactly what she was about to do to him. She then bent down and sucked him off until he got hard. When he did she cut his penis off with a steak knife. She laughed loudly as Tommy screamed out in pain. She waved his now unattached penis in front of his face as she continued laughing. She shoved it into his mouth and tried to make him choke on his own penis. Tawanna’s mother wasn’t done with Tommy yet. She slowly walked down to the basement and grabbed her machete as Tommy laid on the floor upstairs choking on his own dick. Tawanna’s mom calmly walked up the stairs, into the living room, and decapitated Tommy like this was something she’d done before. When she was done she poured herself a drink, lit up a cigarette, and took a seat on the couch. She sat Tommy’s head on the living room table as she calmly waited for the cops to arrive.
Malika’s mom let Tawanna stay with them for two days before she told Tawanna she needed to find some place else to stay. Nobody in the neighborhood wanted anything to do with Tawanna or her family after they heard about what had went down in their house that night. Malika’s mom was nice enough to give Tawanna $50 before she sent her on her way. Tawanna had no idea where to go or what to do. She couldn’t even go to her house to grab some of her things because she was sure that D.H.S was there waiting for her. They would probably try to put her in a group home or something. Tawanna wasn’t with that shit. She couldn’t call any of her family and ask if she could come stay with them, because she was sure that they had heard what went down at the house and exactly why it had happened. This was all her fault, and Tawanna knew it too. She should have never let Tommy’s fat ass touch her. It wasn’t even worth all of this. Tawanna walked down the street in a daze as she wondered what she was going to do next. She sat down on the bench at the bus stop for a minute. She hoped to somehow gather her thoughts for a moment and come up with some sort of a plan. As a bus pulled up Tawanna noticed the billboard on the side of the bus. It was an add for a defense lawyer in Philly. Tawanna smiled and walked over to the bus.
CHAPTER-1(A)
On My Own
After eating and bus fare, Tawanna arrived in Philly with $30 in her pocket. She had no real plan. She did have a hope though. A sort of a last second Hail Mary play as the time on the game clock was winding down in the 4th quarter. Philly was only a hop skip and a jump away from Chester, but it looked much different from what Tawanna was accustomed to. Especially the part of Philadelphia that she found herself in right now. This shit looked like Iraq. Abandoned houses everywhere, abandoned cars everywhere, and trash…..everywhere. After catching three buses, the el train, and about three hours worth of travel time, Tawanna found herself in the middle of the Badlands area of North Philly. 7th & Clearfield Streets to be exact. Tawanna had a cousin who lived somewhere in this part of Philly. Tawanna had not seen or talked to her cousin Shannon since she was 10 years old. Shannon’s mother had kicked Shannon out of the house at 16. Tawanna remembered that her mother had told her that Shannon lived in North Philly on Darien & Clearfield Streets. Tawanna had no idea if Shannon still lived there, but it was worth a try. What the hell did she have to lose? Tawanna had never been to Philly before. She had no idea where she was going. She’d got this far because she was fortunate enough to spark up a conversation with a girl from Philly when she was on the el train. The girl gave Tawanna exact directions on how to get to her destination. She even told her that when she got off of the bus on Clearfield Street she would only have to walk a couple blocks to get to Darien Street. Tawanna got off of the bus at Clearfield Street and was instantly confused. The girl had not told her which direction to walk. If Darien Street had been a numbered street it would have been easy to follow the signs. But as she looked up and down the blocks, she had no idea which direction Darien Street was. All she could do now was walk down Clearfield Street and hope that she bumped into Darien Street along the way. Tawanna flipped a coin to help her decide which direction to go. She began walking down Clearfield Street headed in 6th Street’s direction. Tawanna was going the wrong way. She got all the way down to 3rd Street before she started to wonder if she was going the right way. For the first time since starting this journey, Tawanna was scared. The reality that she had no idea what was going to happen to her or how she was going to survive was starting to sink in. Tawanna walked into the corner store on 3rd Street with tears in her eyes. She was hoping that she would be able to get directions from someone inside the store. Tawanna walked up to the cashier and was about to ask her if she knew where Darien Street was when she heard somebody call her name from behind her. Tawanna turned around.
“Tawanna! I thought that was you when I saw you walk in the store! What the hell you doing way down here?!”
All of the tears that Tawanna was trying to hold in began to run down her cheeks when she saw a familiar face. She ran into Shannon’s arms and hugged her cousin with all of her might.
Things had remarkably fallen into place for Tawanna that day. Shannon was across the street working out a deal with Felix to buy five pounds of weed from him when she saw her little cousin walking into the corner store that day. Luckily for Tawanna too, because Shannon didn’t live on Clearfield & Darien Street anymore, she lived on 9th Street. Tawanna probably would have never found her if she’d actually walked in the right direction and found Darien Street that day. She might have though, because everybody around there knew Shannon. She was a well known hustler all throughout the Badlands area. Shannon sold a little weed on the side to supplement her income sometimes. She really didn’t have to though because Shannon had more sugardaddies than she could count. They were all major players in one illegal hustle or another. Shannon had dudes lining up to get a shot at her. She was easily the baddest chick in the whole “Badlands” area. Shannon’s dad was Puerto-Rican and her mom was black. She was mixed, but most of her facial features were from her spanish side. Her body had definitely come from the black side of the family. If I had to compare Shannon’s looks to someone you might know, I would say that she resembled Erica Mena from “Love & Hip Hop New York.” She had a body like Nikki Minaj. Shannon wasn’t with the guy she’d originally moved to Philly with. He caught a 20 year prison sentence for drug trafficking shortly after Shannon arrived in Philadelphia. With him gone, Shannon quickly learned how to do for self. She met baller after baller at the local bars and had sex with them for money. After being around the many drug selling dudes and watching how they moved and operated, Shannon took some of the money that she got from them and invested into some drugs of her own to sell. Shannon sold a little weed here and there, but a huge portion of her money came from Diablo. He owned 5th Street. They sold nothing but heroin out there. Shannon let Diablo use her crib as a stash house. When the corner’s case worker ran out of racks of heroin, he came to Shannon’s house to get more and drop the money off to her. Diablo’s money was always straight when he came to get it at the end of the work day. Shannon was making thousands of dollars every day. Shannon had been working for Diablo for a few years. When you added the money from her sugardaddies and the money she was making from selling her weed to the equation, one could see that Shannon was doing very well for herself. Shannon could’ve moved out of the hood at anytime she wanted to, but that wasn’t what she wanted. Shannon was a true hoodrat. She didn’t want to be anywhere else but in the hood, out of fear that she might miss something…….What was it that she might miss? She had no idea, but whatever it may be, she wasn’t going to take the chance of not being around the hood whenever it happened. Shannon was 20 years old and living the worry-free life that most people dreamed of living. She had everything a person could want. After talking to Tawanna and learning what had went down between her and her mother, Shannon gladly took her little cousin in with open arms. She had plenty of money and a big house that she lived in all alone. Shannon was actually happy to have Tawanna stay with her. Shannon took Tawanna out and bought her a brand new wardrobe. After that she took her little cousin to school. Not public school, but the school of how to survive in the street. Shannon taught Tawanna how to bag up weed. Once Tawanna had learned enough to do it without Shannon’s help she started to pay Tawanna to do it for her. This way Tawanna would be able to make a little money for herself until something better came along.
Life was going great for Tawanna up until about three months after she’d arrived in Philly. She began feeling sick every day. When she told Shannon about it Shannon told her that she was most likely pregnant. Tawanna knew right away that if she was pregnant it had happened before she’d arrived in Philly, because she had not had sex with anyone since she got here. Every dude that Shannon had introduced her to looked at Tawanna like a little sister. Tawanna was instantly saddened when she realized that she might really be pregnant. Her and her brothers had grown up without a father. Tawanna did not want the same for her child. There was no way in hell that she was having an abortion either, she was keeping her baby. Tawanna headed back to Chester to inform the three men that she’d been having sex with at the time that they were about to be a daddy. Which ever one claimed the child was the father as far as she was concerned, because she had been sleeping with all three men unprotected. She honestly had no idea which one of them got her pregnant. Tawanna tracked down all three men over the next few weeks. All three told her the same thing. There was no way that he was the father, but he would gladly pay for her to have an abortion. Tawanna took abortion money from all three of the men and pocketed it. Fuck them! She figured she could do this on her own. Plus she had her big cousin Shannon by her side. How hard could it possibly be to care for a baby?
Tawanna had a baby girl six months later. She was only fifteen years old and already a mother. Shannon convinced Tawanna to name the baby girl Alize.(Alizay) Tawanna’s child was named after her cousin’s favorite drink at the time. Tawanna didn’t really care what the hell the baby’s name was. Tawanna had a beautiful baby girl, but when she looked into Alize’s eyes she instantly knew who her father was without a question. Old ass Tommy had fucked around and impregnated her the night her mother killed him and almost killed her too. Tawanna was depressed. Tommy was the last person she wanted to be her daughter’s father. If her life was a video game, Tawanna would have hit the reset button right now. This wasn’t a video game though, and there was no reset button, she had a daughter who needed to be cared for and loved. When Tawanna got home she mostly slept in all day. Shannon mostly took care of Alize. She was even the one who nicknamed her Alie. Shannon adored Alie. So much so that she switched up her whole lifestyle for the sake of the baby. Instead of hitting up the bars and clubs every night, Shannon now only went out one night out of the week. Even then, she never really enjoyed herself much when she went out. Shannon was thinking about Alie every minute she wasn’t with her. A few years prior to Tawanna arriving here, Shannon and her boyfriend at the time decided that they wanted to have a baby. Around that time, Shannon thought that she was ready to settle down. When she didn’t get pregnant with her boyfriend after a year of trying, the two decided to go see a doctor to find out what the problem might be. The doctor informed them that Shannon’s womb was incapable of carrying a child for a full pregnancy. Shannon was crushed and so was her boyfriend at the time. He was so crushed that he packed his things up and never looked back. All he wanted out of Shannon’s pretty self was a baby girl. If she couldn’t do that then she was of no use to him. He already had a wife at home who would never be able to give him a child. He didn’t need a sidechick with the same problems. The hurt from that experience was one of the main things that made Shannon bond with Alie the way that she did. While Alie and Shannon were bonding Tawanna was slowly starting to come out of her depression. The minute that she did, she began exercising in her bedroom daily. Tawanna had gained a lot of weight from carrying Alie around for nine months. She planned on shedding a few pounds before the summer rolled around in two more months. Tawanna didn’t have to worry about taking care of Alie while she exercised all day. After her first three weeks on this earth, Shannon moved Alie into the room with her. Tawanna didn’t mind one bit. As far as she was concerned it was a big weight lifted off of her shoulders. With Shannon so in love with Alie she would be free to come and go as she pleased without any sort of responsibilities whatsoever. Tawanna quickly managed to lose the baby weight in the parts of her body that she wanted to. She also lost her baby face. With the extra thickness from the pregnancy still sitting in all of the right places Tawanna was now stacked like a stallion. Her face had now transformed from cute to beautiful. There was nothing little girlie about Tawanna’s looks anymore. She was now a full grown looking woman. Tawanna ventured out into the North Philly streets on the very first day of the hot summer. The shorts she wore were so short that they barely covered her body. It was practically like she was outside in a small pair of panties. Tawanna was bombarded by men trying to holla’ at her before she even made it off of the front steps. All of the corner boys who’d paid her no mind before were all up in her face now. Everyone wanted a piece of her. Tawanna loved all of the attention. She was extra horny too. It had been a very long time since she’d had sex. Tommy was the last man she’d had sex with and it seemed like that was years and years ago. Tawanna was anxious to get out there and get into the mix of things in the city of Philadelphia. The year was 1992 and all of the big ballas’ and shotcallers in the hood drove around in convertible Ford Mustang 5.0’s. Just like every other hoodrat in the city, Tawanna wanted to be seen riding shotgun in one. She took the numbers of the many men who tried to holla’ at her, but she was withholding sex for whoever would be the lucky dude driving a 5.0 who approached her. It took her a week of walking the hood in skimpy outfits, but eventually a balla driving a convertible 5.0 pulled his car over to talk to her as she walked down 9th Street on her way home from the deli one steamy summer night. His name was Stan. He was known around the hood by his nickname Stizzy Mac. Everybody knew Stizzy Mac. He was the biggest crack dealer in the whole Badlands area of North Philly. Tawanna had heard the name Stizzy Mac before on more than one occasion. She heard Shannon talking about him before and a few other females from around the way had mentioned the name before. Everyone had said basically the same thing. The name Stizzy Mac was synonymous with big money. Stizz was thirty two years old, married, and had three children that he claimed. Even with all of that going on in his life Stizz still had a thing for the young chicks. Especially young thick chicks like Tawanna. Stizz moved his wife and kids to New Jersey years ago so he would be free to run wild in the Philly streets without having to worry about word of his infidelities getting back to his wife. Stizz did exactly what he set out to do too. The minute he moved his wife out of town Stizz ran wild. He tried to hit every young thick chick in the city of Philadelphia in the year 1992. Stizz was known in the hood for getting money and fucking all of the young chicks, but he was also known in the hood for something else too. Stizz was known to be a frequent visitor to the free clinic. Stizz was at the free clinic so much that when he walked through the door everyone knew his name. Just like Norm from “Cheers.” The chicks in the hood that were Shannon’s age and older knew of Stizz’s reputation to be a habitual crab carrier and flame thrower, they stayed away from him, but young chicks like Tawanna was so impressed by his money and hood fame that they wouldn’t have cared even if they’d known. Stizz and Tawanna were on their way to the park ten minutes after he met her. Tawanna had sex with Stizz out in Fairmount Park with the top on his convertible down. Stizz loved the young jawns. When Tawanna told him that he was the only person in the hood she’d ever had sex with Stizz wanted to keep it that way. He told her that he was married, but he also told her that she was going to be his only young jawn. The very naive Tawanna believed him. She planned to stay loyal to Stizz unless he gave her a reason not to be. She didn’t talk to or even look at anyone else. Tawanna only saw Stizz when he was coming to pick her up to have sex with her. He always gave her money afterward, but by the time July ended that stopped being enough for her. Tawanna wanted a commitment. She wanted to do the things couples did. She wanted to go to the movies, out to eat, or just anywhere that she could be seen with her man besides at the hotel. Stizz managed to keep Tawanna loyal to him with the promise that he was going to leave his wife to be with her one day soon. Tawanna truly believed that too. That was until she was sitting outside on her steps one night with C-Note. C-Note was one of the guys who hustled right outside in front of Tawanna’s house. C-Note had been trying to have sex with Tawanna since the first time he laid eyes on her. Every night when Tawanna came outside to sit on the steps and hopefully see Stizz drive by, C-Note came over and sat with her and talked to her. He was a funny guy and he made her laugh and all, but she wasn’t giving him the drawls. That was still reserved for Stizz only. C-Note was the person who’d turned Tawanna on to smoking weed and drinking alcohol. She was too young to buy alcohol herself so C-Note would buy them some weed and drinks every night before he came to sit out on the steps with Tawanna all night long. As Tawanna and C-Note sat on the steps drinking and smoking, Stizz drove by in his 5.0 with the top down. Stacy was riding shotgun. Stacy lived right on the next block and was the same age as Tawanna. She couldn’t stand Stacy’s conceited ass and made no secrets about it. Stizz knew this, and now Stizz had the nerve to drive past her house with that bitch in his car? She knew Stizz was going to have sex with Stacy tonight. The good Lord himself wouldn’t have been able to convince her otherwise. And this fool actually had the nerve to drive directly past her house knowing that she would be sitting out there. She was there every night. He had to have known she would be sitting out there. He didn’t even have enough respect for her to drive down a different street. Straight disrespectful! Tawanna became angrier and angrier as these thoughts ran around inside her head. Tawanna was going to show him that it wasn’t as sweet over her way as he may have thought it was. She walked to C-Note’s house with him that night. She fucked him and sucked him off. Tawanna spent the whole night with him. She made sure not to leave his house until around 11:00 am the next morning. By that time of morning the nosy neighborhood hoodrats would be up and about. The news about her and C-Note would definitely be getting back to Stizz. Tawanna sat back and waited to hear from Stizz to see how he would take the news about her sleeping with someone else. Three days later there was a knock at Tawanna’s front door. It wasn’t Stizz though, it was C-Note. He told her that she’d burnt him. C-Note was a cool dude. He wasn’t really upset about getting burnt by Tawanna(It wasn’t like this was the first time that C-Note had been burnt. Back in 92′ 80% of the hood was burning and having sex with each other raw dog.) he just wanted to let her know so she could go to the clinic and get herself taken care of. Tawanna knew that Stizz had to be the one who burnt her. She was done with Stizz. She was also done with having sex without a condom. Tawanna went and got herself taken care of and moved on with her life.
By the time Tawanna turned 16 she was starting to look more and more like a Kerry Washington look alike every day. Tawanna was drop dead gorgeous. She was getting a reputation in the hood of being a freak too. By this time she’d fucked damn near everybody who was a somebody in the hood. Shannon on the other hand had done a complete 180. She wasn’t stashing drugs in her house anymore, she didn’t have her sugardaddies anymore either. She didn’t want that kind of stuff around Alie, who she now called her daughter. Shannon had even cut down to having only one boyfriend. Derrick lived with Shannon on and off. He was nothing like the dudes Shannon usually dated. Derrick was not a street dude. He had a 9 to 5 and worked damn near every day. Derrick was a prison correctional officer and he worked overtime on a regular basis. With all of the overtime he worked, Derrick was making a nice little piece of change. He spent most of that money on Shannon or trying to impress her. By this time, Tawanna was following directly in her mother’s footsteps. Everything was about money to her. She went to the bar every night and left with a different dude every night who she had sex with for money. Tawanna never got carded at the neighborhood bars and clubs she frequented. Looking at her face and body, no one would have believed that she was only 16 years old even if she’d told them that. On an unseasonably warm Friday morning in October Shannon decided to take little Alie to Sesame Place. Sesame Street was her favorite show so Shannon decided to give Alie a little surprise today. Shannon had the whole day planned out. Her and Alie were going to be out all day today and probably wouldn’t be back home until sometime tonight. Shannon asked Tawanna to go with them, but Tawanna declined the invitation. She was in the bed trying to sleep off another hangover from the night before. Tawanna never woke up before 1:00 pm so you can imagine how pissed off she was when she heard someone banging on the front door at 11:00 in the morning. She hoped they would go away, but they didn’t. They just kept knocking and ringing the doorbell. Whoever it was obviously wasn’t going to leave. They’d been out there for over five minutes straight. Tawanna angrily jumped out of the bed and threw on an extra long t-shirt. She was so angry that she didn’t even bother to put any panties on. Tawanna couldn’t wait to get downstairs so she could cuss out whoever the hell this was ringing the damn doorbell like a maniac. Tawanna got downstairs and angrily pulled the door open.
“WHAT THE FUCK YOU WANT!?”
It was Derrick. He was standing there smiling from ear to ear.
“Where Shannon at?”
Tawanna stood in the doorway with her hands on her hips and much attitude.
“She ain’t here.”
“Where she at?”
“How the hell should I know? Do I got a sign on my forehead that says Shannon’s keeper?”
“I need to talk to her. Can I come inside and beep her so I can find out when she’s coming home?”
Tawanna sucked her teeth.
“Phone calls ain’t free. You can use the phone if you got some weed or something.”
Derrick shook his head. Tawanna always wanted something out of a person if she ever did any small thing for them. He thought about cussing her out, but he didn’t have time to argue with her young silly ass right now though.
“Alright, I’m a run down to 5th Street and grab you a couple of dimes right quick.”
Derrick turned around and started walking toward 5th Street to go get some weed for her. Tawanna yelled out to him.
“GET ME A BACON EGG AND CHEESE SANDWICH AND SOME BLUNTS FROM THE CORNER STORE TOO!”
Tawanna closed the front door behind her as she went back inside the house. She ran up the stairs. Tawanna took her t-shirt off as she ran up the stairs and ran straight to the bathroom. She was going to grab a quick shower and sexy herself up real quick before Derrick got back. Even though Tawanna did not tell Derrick, she knew exactly where Shannon was at right now and that she woulodn’t be coming home anytime soon. Tawanna wasn’t really attracted to Derrick, she was more jealous of Shannon. Tawanna had always wanted to fuck one of Shannon’s boyfriends. She really didn’t care which one it was, she just wanted to prove to herself that she could if she wanted to. That day that she would prove this to herself was going to be today. She was going to seduce and have sex with Derrick’s unaware ass and he ain’t even know it.
The doorbell rang fifteen minutes after Tawanna had ran up the stairs. She walked to the top of the staircase and yelled downstairs.
“THE DOOR OPEN DERRICK!”
Derrick walked into the house and took a seat on the couch. He placed the bag with Tawanna’s sandwich and blunt in it on the couch next to him and reached for the phone. As soon as he picked up the phone Tawanna appeared wearing a pair of thongs and a very small tank top. She stood in front of Derrick with her hands on her hips.
“Did you get my weed?”
Derrick nodded toward the bag sitting on the couch.
“Yeah, it’s in the bag with the rest of your stuff.”
Derrick barely looked at her as he spoke. This girl was half his damn age. That kind of shit right there wasn’t his thing, plus he was in love with Shannon, even though she had not let him have sex with her in the whole two months that they’d been a couple. Tawanna noticed that Derrick had barely looked at her, but she was not deterred by that. Tawanna reached over top of him, pretending like she was going for the bag that sat next to him, she quickly redirected her path to his zipper. Before Derrick even knew what was happening she had his pants unzipped and his dick in her mouth. Derrick hung up the telephone……..
Derrick and Tawanna had sex three times, back to back, with no breaks in between. He was like a hungry savage who had not eaten in a year. After they finished Tawanna sat on Derrick’s lap as she rolled up her weed. She could barely manage to do that because Derrick had his hands all over her. Derrick looked at Tawanna as he kissed her back and arms.
“Hurry up and roll that up, I’m ready to go again.”
Tawanna rolled her eyes. She got what she wanted already, and it wasn’t even all that good. She was ready to get away from Derrick and walk around the corner to see if she could find C-note and get herself a proper fucking.
“Damn nigga! You act like you ain’t never had sex before. Shannon must not be giving it to you right.”
Derrick didn’t say anything. He just looked down at the floor. Tawanna looked over he shoulder at him and bust out laughing.
“Oh my fuckin’ God! You ain’t even hit it yet did you?!”
Derrick didn’t say anything. Tawanna kept laughing at him as she spoke.
“Dawg! Shannon a fuckin’ freak! That’s my people and all, but I call it how I see it. Shannon fuck any and everybody. On the first night too! And she got you coming over here every night and not breaking you off. She playin’ you big time dawg!”
Tawanna got up off of Derrick’s lap and looked around for a light as she stood there with the blunt in her mouth. She looked at Derrick.
“You got a lighter on you?”
Derrick looked Tawanna’s way, but he wasn’t looking at her. He was looking through her. Derrick was deep in thought. After a few moments he snapped out of it.
“You right! That bitch is playin’ me! All the shit I be buying her! And she talkin’ bout we gotta wait until we married to have sex!”
Tawanna wasn’t even paying him any mind. She was trying to spark up. She made a motion with her hand of sparking a lighter in Derrick’s direction. It was her way of trying to ask him if he had a light without interrupting his little rant. Derrick paid her no mind and continued talking.
“And to think, my dumb ass came over her today to tell her that I won $375,000 in the lottery last night, and I wanted to take her down to Miami with me for a few days. What a fuckin’ dummy I am!”
As soon as Tawanna heard $375,000 her mouth dropped, so did the blunt that had been in it. Sparking up was now the last thing on Tawanna’s mind. She wanted to know if she’d really heard what she thought she had just heard. Tawanna could barely speak. She choked a little as she tried to talk.
“What did you just say?”
“I said I hit the lottery and I came to take Shannon to Miami with me, but fuck that scandalous bitch now!”
Yup, she’d heard him correctly the first time. There was no way in hell that Tawanna was letting this money get away from her without getting a lil piece for herself.
“Why don’t you take me with you instead?”
Against his better judgement Derrick let Tawanna talk him into taking her to Miami with him. Derrick knew that he was asking for trouble. Not only was he having sex with a minor, but now he was transporting her across state lines. Knowing all of that was not enough to make Derrick think rationally. All he could think about was that he would be having sex with Tawanna and getting some bomb ass head every night for a while. Tawanna grabbed a few things and she was out, without a second thought about her young daughter. Her and Derrick stayed in Harrisburgh for two weeks before Derrick collected his lottery winnings. They got high and had sex every night while they waited in Harrisburgh for the bank to clear the big check. Tawanna never called Shannon to tell her what kind of grimey shit she’d done, or ask about her daughter. Tawanna was having fun. She was not thinking about Shannon or Alie. When the check cleared Derrick and Tawanna jumped on a Greyhound bus headed for Miami. Derrick was not going to take a chance of catching an airplane while he was traveling with the minor. Plus Tawanna didn’t have any kind of I.D. When they arrived in Miami Tawanna was in dreamland. Derrick rented a beautiful condo that overlooked the beach. Even with the beautiful surroundings and weather outside, Derrick didn’t want to do anything but stay in the room all day and fuck. Tawanna wanted to be out in the streets where she could see things and be seen. Derrick didn’t want to go out, he didn’t want her to go out either. The two argued about it every day. Derrick always won the arguments once he threatened to send her back to Philly. Tawanna did not want to go back to Philly. Plus she still hadn’t had the chance to get into Derrick’s pockets like she really wanted to. Derrick had taken her clothes shopping a few times, but it was right back to the condo afterwards. The one good thing about being in Miami with Derrick so far, was that he had a cousin in Miami named Ralphael who supplied them with what seemed like endless amounts of good ass weed. Tawanna was always high and drunk. After two and a half weeks with Derrick at the condo in Miami, he told Tawanna the truth about his plans for Miami. Derrick had no intentions on ever going back to Philly. He was staying here. Derrick offered to buy Tawanna a plane ticket back to Philly. She quickly declined. Tawanna wanted to stay in Miami too. Derrick moved out of the condo and into his cousin’s Ralphael’s house. The house wasn’t totally raggedy, but it was nowhere near what she’d got used to in her time of staying at the beautiful condo overlooking the beach. Tawanna couldn’t figure Derrick out at all. Instead of ballin’ out of control with his winnings, Derrick barely spent any money at all. As a matter of fact, he’d even got a job at a local barbershop. Derrick gave Tawanna a $300 a week allowance. She wasn’t here for that. She could’ve easily made more than that back home in Philly. She was here to get rich some kind of way. With Derrick leaving the house early every morning to go to work and coming back home very late every night, Tawanna immediately started taking advantage of the long hours away from him. Tawanna had sex with Ralphael they very first day Derrick began working at the barbershop. For about a week it was just about her own pleasure because she’d surely never been satisfied sexually by Derrick. Ralphael did the job good enough, but good sex wasn’t everything. Tawanna began charging Ralphael $50 for sex. Ralphael was doing well for himself in the weed game, that was nothing for him. Even though he was paying the tab every day and some days he paid for sex with Tawanna more than once. Ralphael immediately started thinking about a come up. He suggested that Tawanna have sex with his friends and charge them $250 a pop. He would introduce her to his friends with money and all she had to give him was $100 each time. Tawanna was down with it. Ralphael began bringing his friends over to the house, and Tawanna had sex with them. She serviced at least four of Ralphael’s friends every day. It was always safe sex too. This was easy money to her. Easy money that would never end. She was being paid to do what she would’ve gladly done for free. What could be better than being paid to do something you loved doing? Tawanna began to go shopping every day with the money she made. She spent every dollar she made daily because she always knew that she would make it back the very next day. She bought herself all kinds of expensive shoes, clothes, and handbags daily. Going on one of her daily shopping sprees was where Tawanna met Kierra.
Tawanna was in the Gucci shop minding her own business and checking out a pair of shoes when she heard someone behind her talking.
“Ewww those shoes are so fuckin’ ugly!”
Tawanna turned around to see a very pretty woman looking directly at her. Even though the woman was looking directly at her, Tawanna didn’t think that the lady was talking to her. Tawanna was sure that the lady wasn’t crazy enough to be talking to her like she wouldn’t beat her ass right in the middle of this store.
“Who you talking to?”
Kierra smiled at Tawanna.
“I’m talking to you pretty girl.”
The compliment had managed to wipe away the anger that Tawanna had been feeling inside. She smiled back at Kierra.
“What’s wrong with them?”
“Giiirl everything! Those shoes scream ‘come fuck me I’m cheap and easy.’ A pretty girl like yourself needs to be wearing something more classy and less hood-ratty.”
Kierra laughed at her own clever word play. She grabbed a pair of shoes from the shelf and passed them to Tawanna.
“These right here are the kind of thing you want to be wearing.”
Tawanna took the shoes and examined them. She had to admit that they were hot. Tawanna balled up her face as she looked at the price of the shoes.
“$3500! I can’t afford these shoes. You must work in here. I understand that you’re trying to make a commission and all, but you won’t be making it off of me. These are way out of my price range.”
Kierra laughed at her.
“I don’t work here. I should own the place with all of the money I spend up in this bitch. I was just telling you that these would look good on you. That was my honest opinion. As a matter of fact…….you know what? I got you, don’t even worry about it.”
Kierra bought the shoes for Tawanna with her credit card, with the agreement that Tawanna would have lunch with her today. Kierra said that she was supposed to have lunch with her friend today, but she cancelled on her at the last minute. She told Tawanna that she hated to eat alone. Tawanna agreed to have lunch with her and the two left the store together. From the moment the valet bought Kierra’s car around, Tawanna knew that she wanted to do whatever it was Kierra did to make her money. This bitch drove a Benz, looked like Beyonce, and had money to burn. Kierra was definitely somebody who Tawanna wanted to be like. When the two got to the restaurant Tawanna immediately began to grill Kierra. She was dying to find out exactly how Kierra made her money. Kierra never told her exactly what she did to get her money, she just told her that if she ever needed a credit card or two that she could get it for her if the price was right. Tawanna was immediately turned off. She wasn’t in to the credit card fraud stuff, she wasn’t trying to go to jail. Kierra didn’t want to talk about what she did too much though, she wanted to know about Tawanna. When Kierra asked her how old she was Tawanna lied and said that she was 21. Even though Tawanna could easily pass for 21, Kierra knew that she was lying about her age. Kierra was attracted to the pretty girl though. When she started feeling on Tawanna’s leg under the table Tawanna was instantly uncomfortable. Being with a woman wasn’t something that she was totally against, but she wasn’t at all curious about it either. Tawanna managed to fend off Kierra’s advances during lunch, and decided that she didn’t want to be friends with her. Tawanna took Kierra’s phone number simply because she was being nice to her for buying her the very expensive shoes.
Tawanna did not want to do what Kierra did to get money anymore once she learned exactly what it was that Kierra did to get her money, but she did still want to have the kind of money that she thought Kierra had. Tawanna suggested to Ralphael that she should start taking on more customers than just his friends. More customers meant more money for both of them. Raphael wasn’t with it. He knew more people meant more problems, plus he didn’t want all kinds of people he didn’t know knowing where he lived. Ralphael knew his neighborhood and he also knew that people couldn’t be trusted. People would sit around and smoke weed with you all day and then come back later on that night and break into your house. People were grimey like that. Ralphael was aware of it because he was one of those grimey people himself. Tawanna offering him 50% of all of the money she was going to make, and the promise that he could hit it whenever and however he wanted, was enough to make Ralphael agree to Tawanna’s plan. Tawanna began walking the neighborhoods as soon as Derrick would leave for work in the morning time. Tawanna was smart enough not to pick up neighborhood guys. She went to other neighborhoods and walked around. No matter what neighborhood she went to, dudes were on her top right away. Tawanna told them what it was hittin’ for, and if they were willing to pay her price she bought them back to Ralphael’s house with her. Tawanna was making more than triple what she’d been making before. Unlike before, Tawanna was saving most of her money this time. She had big plans for the future. Starting with getting the fuck away from Derrick’s cheap, boring ass. Tawanna knew how to make her own money now. She wouldn’t be needing him or Ralphael anymore very soon. Tawanna was in the house taking a shower when she heard a loud noise come from downstairs. It scared the shit out of her. Tawanna turned the water off in the shower so she could hear things better. She heard loud voices screaming and yelling downstairs. Tawanna was scared to death. The cops had probably raided the house because Ralphael always had pounds of weed just sitting out in the open. She had told him a thousand times that he shouldn’t have that shit sitting around like that. Tawanna grabbed her towel and ran to the bathroom door. She was smacked in the face with a gun and slammed to the floor the minute she opened the door. Tawanna was dragged down the stairs by her hair and thrown on the floor next to Ralphael, who had his hands tied behind his back with rope and his mouth taped with duct tape. Tawanna looked up at her assailant as she laid on the floor. She immediately recognized him. She’d just had sex with him earlier this morning. He was upset and had asked for his money back because she wouldn’t have sex with him without a condom. Tawanna didn’t give him his money back because she’d already had sex with him. She did what she had been paid to do. It wasn’t her fault that she’d made him wear a condom when he didn’t want to. He should’ve got all of that clarified before he even paid her to have sex with him. Her assailant smiled at her as he could see that Tawanna recognized him. He pointed his gun at her head.
“Where the fuck the rest of the weed and money at bitch?!”
Tawanna was terrified.
“I don’t know what you talking about!”
The guy aimed his gun at Ralphael’s head and shot him. Tawanna screamed as she watched the life leave Ralphael’s body. Her assailant pointed his gun at her.
“I’m a ask you one more time. Where the rest of the weed and money at?”
“I DON’T KNOW! I SWEAR I DON’T!”
Tawanna closed her eyes and began crying when she saw him cock the hammer back on the pistol. She tried to remember the prayer her mother taught her when she was a little girl. Tawanna heard a loud bang………and then she felt nothing. She knew that she was dead. Tawanna opened up her eyes to see what the afterlife looked like.
“TAWANNA ARE YOU ALRIGHT? ARE YOU SHOT?”
Tawanna looked up at Derrick standing there with a gun in his hand. She was immediately aware of what had happened and she wanted to thank Derrick for saving her life, but her mouth was not working. She said nothing. She just stared at him. Derrick tried talking to her again.
“ARE YOU HIT ANYWHERE?”
Tawanna said nothing, she just stared. Derrick started checking her body for bullet wounds. When he was certain that she had none Derrick picked her up and carried her out the front door.
“WE GOTTA GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!”
CHAPTER-1(B)
Really???
Derrick put Tawanna in the car then ran back inside the house to grab their things. He wasn’t sure if him killing the guy in order to save Tawanna’s life was going to get him sent to jail or not. He wasn’t going to wait around long enough to find out either. Derrick and Tawanna hopped on a Greyhound bus and headed for Las Vegas. Derrick figured that just in case the cops came looking for him for the shooting, he would easily be able to blend in with all of the people and hustle and bustle of the Vegas life and never be noticed. Derrick rented an apartment not too far away from the Vegas strip. Tawanna did not complain about anything or question any decisions Derrick made. After he saved her life Tawanna had a newfound respect for Derrick. And when he told her that he knew what she was doing when they were in Miami, but didn’t say anything because he knew she wasn’t happy with their sex life and all he wanted for her was to be happy, Tawanna was head over heels in love with him. She couldn’t imagine someone loving her so much that he would let her have sex with other people just to make her happy. Tawanna was sure that she would never find a man like Derrick again in her life, so when he bought her a diamond engagement ring and asked her to marry him, she happily accepted. This was not a fake love. Tawanna was certain that this was the real thing. Derrick got a job at a used car dealership. Derrick worked hard every day and gambled even harder every night. Three months after they arrived in Las Vegas lightning struck twice for Derrick. He won four million dollars on a progressive slot machine. Derrick immediately moved him and Tawanna into one of the upscale suburban neighborhoods. Derrick quit his job at the car dealership to become a full time professional gambler. He spent most of his days at the casinos. While he was out gambling/working all day, Tawanna made a few friends in their new neighborhood. They were all married housewives who didn’t work. Their husbands took care of them. Tawanna never told anyone how old she really was, she told everybody she met that she was 23. Her new housewife friends never questioned her too much about it. They never questioned anyone too much about anything. They were all caught up in their own little world. All they did was drink wine all day, talk shit about people behind their backs, and shop…….every day. Tawanna wasn’t really with all the gossiping stuff, but the drinking and shopping part was right up her alley and she had enough money to shop just like the housewives did. Derrick wasn’t being cheap with her this time. He gave Tawanna any and everything she wanted. The two planned to get married on her 18th birthday. Tawanna’s housewife girlfriends went out to the club practically every weekend. Tawanna wasn’t old enough to get in the club and she didn’t have any kind of fake ID or anything. Every time the housewives would ask Tawanna to go out to the club with them she always came up with some kind of excuse as to why she couldn’t go with them. Her excuses always had something to do with Derrick. Derrick had to do this or that this weekend every time they asked her to go out with them. Because Tawanna always used Derrick as her excuse to get out of going to the club with the housewives, they started to hate Derrick because they thought that he was way too controlling. There were even whispers amongst the nosy housewives that Derrick might be laying hands on Tawanna. None of it was true of course, but that was how it seemed to the housewives being as though Tawanna could never go out clubbing with them.
Everything was great between Derrick and Tawanna for about a year and a half. Things started to change right around three months before Tawanna’s 18th birthday. After listening to the housewives talk about their weekend adventures to the club all day every day, Tawanna began itching to get a taste of the Vegas nightlife. Not so much to have a reason to step out on Derrick, she just really wanted to see what all of the hoopla was about. One afternoon when Tawanna was out with the housewives having lunch she ran into Kierra. She told Tawanna that she’d got into some trouble with the law back in Miami and she was now living here in Vegas for the time being. Tawanna took advantage of the chance meeting with Kierra and came clean with her. She told Kierra that she was 17 years old and asked her if she could hook her up with a fake ID. Kierra said that she would have one for her in a few days. Kierra didn’t charge Tawanna anything for the ID. Kierra still wanted to get a piece of Tawanna and she figured that doing her this favor would be her way in. Tawanna was ready to hit the club the moment Kierra put the ID in her hands. Tawanna hit up the club alone that very night. She wanted to be able to experience everything Vegas nights had to offer, and be able to get a little wild if she wanted, without having someone around to judge her. Tawanna was getting hit on from the moment she walked into the club. She never had to pull out her credit card to pay for anything. She sat at the bar as she flirted and let dudes hit on her all night. Tawanna got three drinks out of each guy. She gave each one of them a few minutes of conversation and her phone number in exchange for them buying her the drinks. Tawanna had a constant flow of guys coming to talk to her. She also had a constant flow of drinks. By 2am Tawanna was “white boy wasted”……….and horny as hell. She knew that the next guy to approach her was getting in her panties tonight. Tawanna could care less what he looked like either. The lucky next guy to approach her was a dude named James. With all of the drinks that she had in her right about now James was looking like the finest dude in this club. James told Tawanna that he’d come to the club with his homies tonight. He said he didn’t have his car so he would have to get his homies to take them to his house. Tawanna was down with it without any hesitation whatsoever. Tawanna went over to James’s house with him and three of his homies. She ended up having sex with all four of them. The guys convinced themselves into thinking that they had successfully talked a very pretty chick into letting them run a train on her, but the truth of the matter was that this was something that Tawanna wanted to do. She just wanted to have one wild and freaky night on the town and then get back to being the devoted fiance’. When Tawanna came walking into the house the next morning Derrick was furious. He didn’t know exactly what she’d done last night, but he was sure that she’d cheated on him again. Derrick barely spoke to Tawanna after that. They still lived together, but things would never be the same between them. When Tawanna’s 18th birthday rolled around Derrick did not marry her. Tawanna was deeply saddened and disappointed. She missed what she’d once had with Derrick. She had failed to appreciate the good thing she had going. Tawanna knew that she needed to make things right with Derrick. His birthday was in a couple of weeks and Tawanna knew exactly how she was going to make it up to Derrick.
Tawanna managed to convince Derrick to let her take him out to dinner on his birthday. She also managed to get him to lose the little attitude he’d been carrying around for months. They went out dancing after dinner. After a few hours of bumping and grinding on the dance floor Derrick was hornier than ever. Tawanna had him right where she wanted him. Derrick wanted to go to a hotel. He couldn’t wait to get his paws on his fiance’ tonight. Tawanna talked him into waiting until they got back to the house to get it on. Derrick was on her from the minute they walked into the house. She could barely stop him from ripping her clothes off at the front door. She stopped him long enough to tell him that she wanted to have sex in the shower. Tawanna told Derrick to go upstairs and get in and she would be up there to join him in a minute. Derrick ran upstairs and got into the shower. As he let the water from the shower head run down his face, he was hugged from behind and blessed with a soapy hand job. Derrick was ready to get it poppin.’ He turned around surprised to see that it was not Tawanna who stood behind him, it was Kierra. Derrick didn’t know Kierra. He was stunned. He was even more stunned to see Tawanna standing behind Kierra in the shower. Tawanna smiled at him.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!”
Tawanna moved past Kierra and kissed Derrick on the lips. Kierra got on her knees and began giving him the blowjob of his life. Derrick was feeling like the luckiest man in the world right now, to be lucky enough to be in this shower getting pleasured by these two beautiful women right now. The night was just getting started though. After the three finished in the shower they took their little party to the bedroom. Kierra was immediately on Tawanna and Derrick was immediately on Kierra. While Tawanna lay on her back getting ate out by Kierra who was on her knees, Derrick ate Kierra out from the back. After a while Derrick began to have sex with Kierra doggystyle. Truth be told, the whole time Derrick was having sex with Kierra he was imagining Tawanna not being there at all.
After having sex for hours and hours, the three fell asleep right there in the bed. Derrick slept in the middle of the two women. Derrick found himself spooning with Kierra when he woke up in the morning. Tawanna was on the other side of the huge bed by herself snoring away. Derrick slid himself inside of Kierra. She didn’t miss a beat. Her body moved with his even before she was fully awake. They had sex twice without Tawanna even waking up. She snored away, totally unaware of what was going on next to her in her bed. Derrick went back to sleep when they were done. Kierra snuck out of the house when she was sure that Derrick was sleep. When Derrick woke up again he was immediately looking for Kierra. She wasn’t there. After she’d blessed him with a great threesome on his birthday, Tawanna and Derrick were on good terms again. As a matter of fact, they were even better than they were before Tawanna cheated. Tawanna began secretly hoping that the wedding was going to be on again. She wasn’t going to pressure Derrick or ask him about it, she was just going to wait until he came to her with their wedding date. Derrick came to her, it was not about a wedding date though. Derrick suggested that they have another threesome so that they could keep their relationship fresh and spicy. Tawanna agreed. She would’ve agreed with anything Derrick asked for in the hope that she could keep things good between them. Tawanna suggested going out to the club to see if they could pick up a woman to bring into their bed with them. Derrick was having none of it. He only wanted one woman involved in their threesome, and that one woman was Kierra. Tawanna was reluctant to bring Kierra back into their bed again. Everything inside of Tawanna was telling her that it was a terrible idea to have a threesome with the same woman twice. On top of that, Tawanna was somewhat intimidated by Kierra being around Derrick. Even though she had no idea that Derrick had sex with Kierra in the morning while she was right next to them in the bed sleeping, Tawanna did take notice of the fact that Kierra had most of Derrick’s attention the night of the threesome. He barely touched Tawanna that night. Tawanna despised that, but she had to admit that their relationship had got much better after the first threesome. Tawanna figured that if they did it again their relationship could only get better. She was wrong. One more threesome quickly turned into an every weekend thing with Kierra. The weekend thing soon turned into an almost daily thing. The almost daily thing eventually turned into Kierra moving into the house with them. Tawanna still held onto the hope that Derrick would marry her. Having the multiple threesomes had helped Tawanna learn that Kierra wasn’t really a threat to her. While Derrick was attracted to Kierra like crazy, Kierra was attracted to Tawanna. It was clear to Tawanna that Kierra probably wouldn’t even have slept with Derrick if she wasn’t after her in the first place. Every time Derrick left the house for even five minutes, Kierra was all over Tawanna. They had sex every time Derrick took his eyes off of them. Kierra couldn’t get enough of Tawanna. She was in love with Tawanna, and she threw Tawanna for a loop when she asked her to leave Derrick’s dumb ass and go away from here with her. Tawanna turned her down. She was in love with Derrick and she was in it for the long haul. Tawanna was no dummy. She loved Derrick, but she was sure that if her and Kierra had sex alone every time Derrick left the house, then him and Kierra was doing the same thing every time she walked out the front door. Tawanna was cool with that because she knew that she loved Derrick and Derrick loved her. Kierra was just here for sport. Tawanna figured that Derrick would get tired of Kierra soon enough. All she needed to do was sit back and wait it out. When Tawanna went out to lunch with the housewives on a Tuesday afternoon, she fully expected to come home and catch Derrick and Kierra having sex without her. When she arrived at the house she saw nothing……..absolutely nothing at all. Kierra and Derrick had managed to have everything, and I mean everything moved out of the house while she was gone. The two of them were nowhere to be found either. Tawanna didn’t have any money of her own. She always used Derrick’s credit cards whenever she spent money. It had been his way of keeping her on a leash. Let her buy herself nice things with his credit cards, but never give her any doe of her own. Tawanna didn’t pay for lunch when she went out today, and she now had a very strange feeling that her credit card wouldn’t have worked if she would’ve tried to. She was almost certain that her cards weren’t any good anymore. She had nothing, and was all alone in this world………..again.
CHAPTER-1(C)
School Of Hard Knocks
Tawanna was right in assuming that the credit card she was holding had been cancelled. It was. Tawanna was hurt to be deceived in this way by two people she’d trusted. She was hurt to her very core. Tawanna was hurt, but she wasn’t just going to roll over and die though. She refused to do that over a man. Tawanna put her pride to the side and went to the housewives. She asked them if she could borrow a few dollars until her fiance’ came back from his business trip. The women knew that Tawanna was lying. Gossip had already spread like wildfire about how Derrick had left her to be with another woman. The housewives still let Tawanna borrow a few dollars. Tawanna had a few dollars in her hand now, but she wasn’t going to live in the house anymore. She couldn’t afford the rent by herself. Even if she could, she would never be able to handle the embarrassment of having to look at the faces of the very judgemental housewives each and every day. Tawanna managed to get $1000 total out of the women. Tawanna went and rented a room in a cheap motel. She planned to stay here for a few weeks until she figured out her next move. She figured that it shouldn’t take her more than a couple of weeks to get herself together and figure out what to do next. Tawanna stayed inside the room for two days straight wrecking her brain to try to figure out a way to make some money. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t think of any type of hustle that wouldn’t include her selling her body for money. That was the last thing that she wanted to do after her experiences in Miami. On her third day at the motel Tawanna left her room and hit the streets looking to buy a little weed to smoke. Hopefully a little tree would help her to see things more clearly. Tawanna bought $50 worth of weed from a guy standing on the corner up the street from the motel. The guy tried his hardest to pick Tawanna up. Tawanna didn’t give him any type of play, she was scared of the drug dealing thug type of dudes now. They reminded her of the guy who killed Ralphael. Those type guys bought nothing but trouble to anyone who was unfortunate enough to come anywhere near them. Tawanna walked back to her motel room after she bought her weed and politely told the weed dealer she had a boyfriend. As she passed the room right next door to hers she noticed that the front door was wide open. Tawanna looked inside as she walked by. She was startled to see an older looking white man hanging from the ceiling with a belt wrapped around his neck. His legs swang wildly around as he gasped for air and grabbed at his throat. The man’e eyes were wider than life itself and his face was turning blue. Tawanna let out a small scream at first. Then something inside of her made her leap into action. She ran past the hanging man and found a knife inside the junky room. She climbed up on the chair the man had kicked over while his legs swang wildly and cut the belt. It was a hard job to do with the man reaching and grabbing for her the whole time, but she got the job done. The man fell to the floor. He was alive, but he still gasped for air as he grabbed at what was left of the belt that was still wrapped around his neck. Tawanna dived on the floor and managed to get the belt from around the man’s neck. He laid on the floor breathing heavily as the life slowly began to come back into his body and face. Tawanna ran to the bathroom and filled a cup with water from the faucet. She helped the man sit up and she helped him take a few sips of the water. As she looked at his face, Tawanna could see that he was going to be alright. After the man drank some of the water and started to come back to life, he looked at Tawanna with pure hatred in his eyes.
“Bitch what the fuck you do that for!?”
Tawanna was stunned.
“What?”
“Why the fuck you don’t just mind your own business you black bitch!”
Tawanna was outraged by this ungrateful old bastard.
“FUCK YOU! I SHOULD’VE LET YOUR RACIST ASS DIE!!”
Tawanna turned around and started stomping out the door. She was steaming mad.
“I wish you would have…..”
Tawanna didn’t hear what he said, but she was hyped and ready for an argument or fight. She turned around and stared darts of death at the old man.
“WHAT!?”
The guy was sitting on the floor with his face in his hands. He looked up at Tawanna with tears running down his face.
“You should have let me die.”
Tawanna was instantly saddened when she looked into the old man’s eyes. For some reason, the pitiful look that was on his face right now had touched her heart in ways that were hard to explain. In some crazy kind of a way his pain and hurt made her feel a connection to him. Tawanna knew that whatever was bothering the man was something that ran deep. She walked over and took a seat on the floor next to him.
“What’s your name?”
“Jimmy.”
The man managed to get out of his mouth in between his muffled cries. Tawanna looked at Jimmy.
“You need a hug Jimmy?”
Tawanna extended her arms wide and Jimmy gratefully went in for a hug. He held her tightly as he cried his eyes out. Tawanna said nothing as she hugged Jimmy and patted him on the back. After five minutes straight of being hugged and feeling the warmth of another caring human being, Jimmy was starting to feel a little better. Jimmy finally let go of Tawanna and wiped his eyes as he looked at her.
“Thank you miss. I really needed that. You’re like an angel sent down from the skies above.”
Tawanna could see Jimmie’s emotions slowly transforming from grief to lust right before her eyes. Tawanna was not trying to go down that path with him, but she knew it might be dangerous to his sanity for her to just straight shoot him down, especially with him being in the fragile state that he was in right now. Tawanna would never be able to forgive herself if Jimmy tried to hurt himself again and she’d had something to do with it. Tawanna smiled at him as she attempted to divert his thoughts away from lusting after her.
“So Jimmy, tell me about yourself.”
Jimmy really needed someone to talk to, and Tawanna had just given him the opportunity that he needed. Jimmy poured his heart out to her for hours and hours. Tawanna rolled her weed and smoked it with Jimmy as she listened to him tell her of how he’d got to the position he was in when she found him hanging from the ceiling. Jimmy was a 66 year old successful investment banker. He started at the company he worked at late in life, but he rose quickly once he started working for the company. They’d sent him to Vegas to oversee the company’s operations out here. Jimmy was doing very well in his professional life, but his personal life lacked substance. He was a very wealthy, but lonely man. Jimmy met a 25 year old Russian woman named Gretchen who worked as a cocktail waitress. Jimmy was immediately infatuated with the young woman and he asked her out on a date. She allowed Jimmy to take her on a date and Jimmy tried his best to impress. He took her out to Hollywood on his private jet for a romantic lunch. Afterward he took her shopping on Rodeo Drive. Gretchen went to Jimmy’s house that night and never left. Jimmy married her three days later without any type of pre-nuptial agreement or anything. He was sure that they shared a love that would last forever. 98 days after getting married, Gretchen filed for a divorce. Jimmy never saw it coming. He didn’t even have any idea that their marriage was in trouble until he was served with divorce papers at his job. Gretchen came the hell up in the divorce settlement. Jimmy was worth $20 million and Gretchen walked away from the marriage with about 12 of that. Strangely enough, that wasn’t the thing that made Jimmy try to hang himself. Money was just money. He could always make more of that. Jimmy was pushed over the edge when he found out that Gretchen had recently married her long time boyfriend Boris. Gretchen was with Boris the whole time she’d been married to Jimmy. The two had plotted out the whole scheme together. Jimmy was more than embarrassed to be played like this. Jimmy was in the business world. People getting played or playing someone was not an idea that was foreign to him. The problem that Jimmy had with getting played was that it was two dumb ass Russians who had played him. Jimmy was a very smart man. He considered himself much smarter than his ex-wife, and if that was the case, then he figured he should have seen something like this coming from a mile away. That was what made Jimmy try to hang himself. The fact that someone who he thought was dumb had beaten him, he who was someone who considered himself a genius. Tawanna was intrigued by the whole story. She found that listening to someone else’s problems made her own problems seem very small. Tawanna smoked and listened to Jimmy talk all night long. She added her little two cents here and there, but she mostly just listened. After talking to Tawanna all night Jimmy was feeling a million times better than he had the night before. In the morning he gave Tawanna $1000 and asked her if he could come back later tonight after he got off work and talk with her again. Tawanna started to say no. She was sure that Jimmy was going to try to hit on her sooner or later, but because he’d gave her $1000 she felt obligated to see him at least one more time. She agreed to see him again later on tonight. Tawanna was tired after being woke all night. She went next door to her room and crashed. She was awakened by a knock on her door at 7:00 pm. It was Jimmy, and he bought some weed and a pint of Hennesy with him. They talked, smoked, and drank all night long. Once again, he gave her $1000 in the morning. Jimmy asked her if he could come by to see her once a week. He promised to pay her every time they met. Jimmy also told her that he didn’t want to have to come all the way down to the ghetto to see her. Jimmy had a bunch of properties in Las Vegas and he offered to put her up in one of his many apartments rent free. Tawanna gladly accepted the offer. That was only after she made it crystal clear to Jimmy that sex was something that was never going to happen between them. Jimmy agreed, he wasn’t looking for sex from Tawanna. He was looking to have someone to talk to who wouldn’t judge him.
Tawanna moved into her new apartment two days later, and just as promised, Jimmy came by for his appointment with her once every week. He paid her $1000 every time he visited her. They never had sex or even came close to having sex. Jimmy talked and Tawanna listened. When Tawanna wasn’t seeing Jimmy she mostly stayed inside her apartment. Since she was spending most of her time inside her apartment, Tawanna fixed the place up to her liking. When she was done her crib was nice. She didn’t have very expensive things, but her stuff was nice, and even better it was hers. After a month of seeing Jimmy, he surprised her when he asked if she could talk to a friend of his who was having some issues with his marriage. Jimmy said his friend thought his wife was cheating on him and he had no idea what to do. Tawanna reluctantly agreed to see jimmy’s friend. She had a very strange feeling that Jimmy might be trying to pimp her out. To Tawanna’s surprise, Jimmy’s friend talked about his wife their whole visit. Sex did not seem to be on his mind at all. Just like Jimmy, he paid Tawanna $1000 after she’d finished listening to him talk about his problems and offering up small bits of advice here and there. He also began seeing Tawanna one night a week at the price of $1000 per visit. Jimmy’s friend told Tawanna of one of his friends that might benefit from seeing her. Tawanna agreed to see him too. He also started seeing Tawanna once a week and paying her $1000 per visit. Tawanna now had three clients paying her $1000 per visit and she saw all three of them at least once a week. She was making easy money from the men without having sex with any of them. Sometimes Tawanna laughed as she sat back and got high thinking about how these old ass men were paying her to not have sex with them. This whole thing was crazy to her. She wasn’t complaining though! Tawanna’s client list grew when her third client told her that he had a friend who might want to see her weekly. Tawanna gladly agreed. More clients meant more money for her. Tawanna’s newest client paid her a visit Friday night. Tawanna knew that he was different from the rest the moment he showed up at her door. Her newest client was named Tex. He was a 47 year old white man from Texas who’d made more money in oil than he would ever be able to spend in two lifetimes. Tex was an old school cowboy type of Texan. He was the stereotypical Texan from head to toe. He wore the big cowboy hat, the big ass belt buckle, and the cowboy boots with the spurs attached. Like I said, very stereotypical. The only thing that Tex was missing was the six shooter and big ass gun holster on his hip. Tex was extra hype as he spoke, and unlike the rest of Tawanna’s clients, Tex did not seem to be depressed at all. Tex talked and talked about everything except for the reason he was here. Tawanna listened, but when there was a break in the conversation she had to cut in and ask.
“You seem very happy. Why did you want to talk to me?”
“I like to sniff ass and I need help stopping.”
Tex didn’t smile or skip a beat as he answered Tawanna’s question. From her experiences talking to her other clients, Tawanna learned that she was expected to listen and not judge at all, but she couldn’t stop herself from giggling as she spoke.
“What?”
“I’m a habitual ass sniffer.”
Tex did not smile as he spoke. Tawanna could see that he was not joking. She just couldn’t wrap her mind around what he was saying.
“I’m not following.”
Tex shook his head.
“What I gotta do? Prove it to you?”
Tawanna nodded without saying a word. She was more than curious. She walked over to Tex and stood in front of him.
“Yeah show me.”
Tex led her to the bed and laid her on her stomach. He pulled her tights down to her ankles and her panties along with the tights. Tawanna giggled as Tex put his nose directly in between her butt cheeks and sniffed away with pleasure. Tawanna thought Tex was joking when he’d first said the words out of his mouth, but now that he was down there she truly believed that he was a vicious booty sniffin’ bul who got off on this kinky shit. Tex enjoyed sniffing a woman’s booty, but that wasn’t Tex’s real problem though. After sniffing Tawanna’s booty for ten minutes Tex pulled out a bag of cocaine and started snorting coke off of her butt cheeks. Snorting cocaine was Tex’s dirty habit that he hoped to rid himself of.
Tex quickly became Tawanna’s favorite client. Especially when she learned the he not only sniffed booty, Tex ate it too. Tawanna got her booty sniffed and ate weekly and was getting paid $1000 to let someone do it to her. Tex never wanted to have intercourse. He just wanted to smell and eat the groceries. Instead of helping Tex fix his problems, Tawanna soon became a part of them. Tawanna began snorting cocaine with Tex. Tawanna got sucked into the lure of the drug in a heartbeat. She got addicted to the drug almost from the moment she took her first snort. At first she was just snorting once a week when Tex came for his visits and bought some coke with him. She soon started buying and snorting coke when he wasn’t there with her. Tawanna began buying and snorting cocaine on a daily basis. She started to cancel appointments with all of her clients except for Tex. She began to spend all of her time and money on snorting cocaine. Tawanna’s clients soon stopped calling her to make an appointment at all. Tex fucked around and took himself to a real rehab facility to get himself clean. Jimmy was infuriated with Tawanna when he found out that she was a junky. He kicked her out of his apartment. Just as quickly as God had blessed Tawanna, cocaine had managed to come along and steal her blessings right from up under her. Tawanna was out on the street again. This time was worse though. She had that cocaine monkey on her back and the monkey needed to be fed……constantly.
Tawanna moved right back into the same cheap ass motel. She didn’t have time to wait on a hail mary to fall into her lap this time. She needed some doe right now. Tawanna hit the strip in search of a few tricks. She didn’t have to look far before she found herself a customer. She was a fresh face out on the track and everybody wanted a piece of the fresh meat. Tawanna easily managed to feed her habit and pay her rent on time every week. After nine months, and Tawanna doing more and more cocaine every day, her vanity of being a new face on the strip was starting to wear off. She was just another hoe out of the many hoe’s on the hoe stroll. When she first started tricking she was easily getting anywhere between $400-$1000 per trick. She was now down to averaging about $20 per trick. She was lucky if she could convince a customer to pay her $100 or more now. Tawanna lost a little piece of herself everytime she slept with the men for the very small amounts of money. It was barely enough to feed her habit which had now graduated to smoking crack. Tawanna was a walking zombie. Simply trickin’ was not going to be enough to feed her habit anymore. Tawanna began stealing from her customers. Whenever she gave a man a blow job and his pants was down around his ankles, Tawanna was in his pockets. She’d got good with it over time too. Tawanna robbed one of her tricks one night and came up off two credit cards she’d managed to finesse out of his wallet without him suspecting. Tawanna headed to Circuit City bright and early the next morning. Tawanna filled up two shopping carts with all electronics. She was going to sell the stuff to a few of her crack dealers and come the hell up. She was dreaming of smoking crack boulders as she waited in line for the cashier to swipe her credit card. Tawanna’s dreams were interrupted when she felt herself being grabbed up by one of the store’s security guards.
CHAPTER-1(D)
Getting It Together
Tawanna had no idea, but the store had been on alert from the moment she walked through the door. She looked a mess. The store security guards were just sitting and waiting for her to try something. She came into the store with mismatched shoes on, she was wearing a raggedy ass leather trench coat on the over 100 degree day in Las Vegas, and her filthy sweatpants had more holes in them than Swiss Cheese. Tawanna was looking like a bag lady that day. The security guards were expecting her to steal something. Tawanna didn’t steal anything, but when the cashier called security and said someone was trying to use a stolen credit card, security jumped into action. They’d been following her around the whole time and were practically in line with her anyway. They didn’t get her for stealing, but they got her for something. An arrest was an arrest in their book. Tawanna was arrested and originally charged with being in possession of and trying to use a stolen credit card. When the trick she’d stole the card from the night before got a call from the police saying that a black woman had been caught trying to use the card he reported stolen last night, he told them that he’d been robbed at gunpoint by a black woman and a black man. Once he went down to the police station and identified Tawanna as one of the culprits who’d robbed him her charges were upgraded to armed robbery. The robbery was the story he’d given his wife when he went home that night missing two of his credit cards. His wife was the one who was forcing him to press charges and have the animals who’d robbed him at gunpoint prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Tawanna found herself in a situation that she had never been in before. She was up shit’s creek without a paddle. They were probably going to convict her for possessing and attempting to use the stolen credit card, but she was sure that she would not be able to be prosecuted for robbing someone with a gun. There was no evidence to prove that had ever happened. It was true too. There was insufficient evidence to even charge Tawanna with conspiracy to armed robbery, let alone convict her of the charge. Tawanna’s public defender didn’t tell her that though. Being as though the prosecutor was a woman he hoped to have sex with in the future, Tawanna’s grimey ass public defender served her up to the prosecution on a silver platter as a hope of gaining some sort of favor with the prosecutor. One of those “I scratch your back you scratch my back” kind of deals. Tawanna had two seperate cases for the one crime involving the credit card. Her public defender advised her that her best bet was to plead guilty to both cases and pray like hell that the judge would consolidate her sentences. Tawanna knew nothing about the law. She trusted in her public defender. Tawanna did as he suggested and got her ass booked! She received a 2-4 year sentence for the robbery case. Then turned around and got another 1-2 years for attempting to use the stolen credit card. That wasn’t the worst part. The worst part was that she was to serve the sentences consecutively. Tawanna was crushed.
Once Tawanna got back to the jail after coming from court and looked up a few things in the law library she found out two things. The first one was that her court appointed attorney had royally fucked her over. The second was that her sentence wasn’t as bad as she’d first thought it was. The consecutive part was as bad as she thought it was, because that meant that she had to finish serving the first sentence before she even started serving the second one, but the sentences weren’t actually as long as she thought they were. She was going to do 6 months in jail on the 1-3 year sentence and then another six months behind bars on the 2-4 year sentence. The rest of the time was suspended. Tawanna was going to do about a year in jail altogether. She already had six months in by the time she went to court to get sentenced, so that meant that she only had six more months left to do. The best part about that was she was going to be able to do the rest of her time right here in the county jail. Tawanna was already dug in at this point. Another six months would be a walk in the park from here. With the sentencing phase out of the way Tawanna decided to use the rest of her time here as a drug rehab. She was clean and looking good again and she needed to learn how to stay this way. Tawanna enrolled in every single drug rehabilitation program that the jail had to offer. A requirement of one of the classes she took was for her to stand up in front of the whole group and speak about how her addiction may have affected her family and loved ones. That part of the program struck a cord with Tawanna. For the first time since she’d left Philly she was forced to think about her young daughter that she’d abandoned. What kind of a woman would abandon their child like that? And for what? A man that she wasn’t even with anymore. What kind of a horrible human being was she? Tawanna began to hate herself, everyone, and everything that had led her to this point in her life. She refused to feel sorry for herself though. Tawanna was going to make things right. For herself and her young daughter.
Tawanna was released from jail on a warm day in September. She had a bus ticket to Philly, which had been supplied by the jail, and $100 in her pocket that she’d managed to save over time from her job in the jail’s kitchen. Tawanna couldn’t help but to laugh at her current situation. This was exactly where she was in life the first time she went to Philly. Tawanna had very little money to her name and had no idea what to expect once she got to Philly……again. The only difference this time was that it wasn’t just about her own survival now. It was about her and her daughter. Tawanna tried to formulate some sort of a plan on the three day bus ride to Philly. The first thing she was going to need to do was get a job and find a place to live at. She was more than sure that she wasn’t going to be able to stay with Shannon again. She was certain that Shannon probably hated her with a passion. Tawanna was sure that getting Alie back from Shannon was going to be an uphill battle, especially knowing how Shannon felt about Alie. Her daughter probably thought Shannon was her mother by now. Alie didn’t know Tawanna at all. Tawanna had made up her mind that she was getting her baby girl back no matter what though. First she needed to find a place for her and her baby to live at. Second she needed to find a job….immediately. Tawanna was not going to go after her child until she got her shit together all the way.
Tawanna got a job almost immediately after she stepped foot off of the bus when it arrived in Philly. She noticed a “NOW HIRING” sign in the window of a diner right around the corner from the bus depot. They were hiring for the waitress position. Tawanna walked inside and gave it a shot. What the hell did she have to lose? Tawanna was hired on the spot and began working immediately afterward. She was making $5.50/hr. plus tips. It wasn’t much, but she had a job, and Tawanna had told herself a while ago when she was in prison that she would have to start from the bottom if she ever wanted to make it to the top. Tawanna rented a room in a ran down filthy motel on Walnut Street in Center City. The room was $75 a week. It was cheap, and very dangerous. The motel was a spot that crackhead hookers took their tricks to when they turned tricks. There was always people smoking crack in the hallways of the hotel and crack dealers sold their crack all inside and around the outside of the motel. This was the last place that a recovering crack addict should be living at. It would be more than easy for Tawanna to slip back into her old habit. Her former drug of choice was very accessible here. Tawanna couldn’t afford to live anywhere else though. She knew that her best chance at survival would be for her to stay out of the motel and her room as much as possible in order to avoid the smell of crack smoke and temptation that was heavy in the air of the place. Tawanna only planned on sleeping and washing there. She figured that she had so many things that she needed to accomplish that she wouldn’t be doing much sleeping anyway. Tawanna worked at the diner for 8 hours a day, six days a week. That wasn’t enough for Tawanna. She went and found another job at a cleaning company in Center City. The company cleaned office buildings around the city after work hours. Tawanna worked there for 8 hours overnite five days a week. She would go from her job at the diner directly to her job at the cleaning company. Tawanna was making $9.00/hr. working for the cleaning service. It was at the cleaning service where she met a woman named Tanya. She was the one who told Tawanna about going to school to be a registered nurse. It was what Tanya was doing with her days while she worked nights. Tanya told Tawanna that she didn’t plan on working for the cleaning service for the rest of her life, and that Tawanna shouldn’t either. Tanya said that a person could get certified after going to school for four hours a day for ten months. When Tanya told Tawanna how much registered nurses made, Tawanna knew that was what she needed to be doing. Tawanna took a trip to the school the next morning and enrolled in the classes. Tawanna quickly learned that working two jobs and going to school every day was going to be too much for even her. The distances were too far away from each other, and with Tawanna catching the unpredictable SEPTA busses everywhere she traveled to, she would always be late for something. Tawanna knew that she would have to cut something lose. Tawanna decided to work less hours at the diner, that freed up a few needed hours every day. She only worked four hours a day there now. Tawanna worked or went to school every day except for Sunday. On Sunday’s she got out of the motel and spent her days down at Penns Landing looking at boats sail by and formulating a plan to get her daughter back. Ten months later Tawanna graduated at the top of her class in nursing school. She had no problem at all getting a job in her field after graduating. She was hired by Fairview Care Center for the elderly in Chestnut Hill. Tawanna was making good money from the minute she began working there. She immediately moved out of the motel. Tawanna moved into a beautiful apartment not far from her new job. She quit her other two jobs also. She was making more than enough money to support herself from her one job at the nursing home. Tawanna bought herself a car a few weeks later and her come up was complete. It was now time for her to go get her daughter back.
Tawanna drove down to North Philly to Shannon’s house on a Tuesday afternoon. Shannon still lived at the same house. To Tawanna’s surprise, Shannon was not mean to her nor acted as if she held any ill will toward her. Alie wsn’t there. She was at school, Shannon said she would be coming home soon. Tawanna decided to wait for her. Shannon was now a married stay at home housewife. Even though the doctors once said that she would never have children, she’d miraculously given birth to a healthy baby boy last year. Tawanna held and played with Shannon’s son while her and Shannon talked and waited for Alie to get home from school. Tawanna broke down and cried when Alie came running through the front door smiling. She was dying to show Shannon the picture of her family that she drew at school today.(The picture did not include Tawanna.) Tawanna couldn’t believe how much her daughter looked like her. She was really her mini-me. It had been six long years since the last time she’d seen her daughter. Shannon sat Alie down and tried to explain to her that the stranger standing here with them was her mother. The little girl could not comprehend what was going on. Tawanna tried to talk to Alie after Shannon introduced her to Alie as her mother. Alie wasn’t having it. She shut completely down and just stared at the strange woman who was talking to her. Tawanna was somewhat discouraged, but she’d already told herself that this was going to be something that was going to take some time. She stayed with Alie for two hours that first day until she had to leave and go to work. Before Tawanna left Shannon pulled her to the side and politely told her that she could come and spend time with Alie whenever she wanted, but there was no way in hell that she was ever going to give Alie to her. Tawanna understood where her cousin was coming from and she agreed to the supervised visits, but there was no way in hell that she wasn’t taking her baby with her one of these days. Tawanna went to Shannon’s house to visit with Alie every single day for six months straight. Alie eventually got used to Tawanna being around and started to open up to her. She was beginning to understand that Tawanna was her mother. After six months Shannon started to allow Tawanna to take Alie all day on Saturdays. Mommy and daughter always had a blast and Tawanna bought Alie anything she asked for. After another month Tawanna started to keep Alie for the whole weekend. And after two months of that, Tawanna simply never took Alie back to Shannon’s house. She told Shannon that Alie was her daughter and she couldn’t do shit about it. Shannon protested fiercely, but she never took any legal action against her cousin. When Tawanna told Alie that she would be staying with her for good Alie cried and cried. She was cool with being with her mother on the weekends, but as far as Alie was concerned Tawanna was not her real family. Shannon was her family. Tawanna had no idea how to get Alie to stop crying and being sad. Tawanna had no idea what to do. She just wanted her daughter to love her. Tawanna took Alie to “Toys R Us” and bought her daughter a bunch of dolls and a huge doll house. The strategy worked. Alie played with her dolls all day and even asked Tawanna to play with her sometimes. It wasn’t long before Alie got bored with the dolls, and she was back to being sad and crying all day again. Tawanna immediately took her back to “Toys R Us.” It seemed to work for her the first time. Why not try it again? Tawanna let Alie get whatever she wanted. Alie got a few more dolls and she also got a kid’s karaoke machine with a microphone. That quickly became Alie’s favorite toy. Alie sang all day and all night. She was in her own little world when she sang and seemed to be very happy when she did. The next year Tawanna tried to put Alie in public school. All of Alie’s little friends she’d met in the neighborhood over the summer went to private school. Alie wanted to go where her friends were going. By this time Alie had learned that if she cried Tawanna would give her anything she wanted. Tawanna enrolled Alie in the private school even though she had to start working plenty of overtime at the job to help pay for it. She didn’t mind though. Tawanna would do anything for Alie. Alie got accustomed to her mother doing any and everything for her. Alie believed that her mother could make anything she asked for happen. She truly believed that her mom could part the waters of the ocean if she’d asked her to. By the time she was ten years old Alie was sure that she was a great singer. That was all she did in her spare time. She told Tawanna that she wanted to be a singer and she fully expected her mother to make it happen for her. Tawanna didn’t have a single clue about the music industry or anything industry related, but if it was her baby’s wish to be a singer, then she was going to make it happen for her or die trying. Tawanna signed Alie up to sing in a local talent show. Deep down inside Tawanna didn’t think Alie was really all that good and she feared that singing in front of a crowd of people might make Alie realize that she really wasn’t. She still signed her daughter up for the talent show. This would be her childs first lesson in how rough life could be. Little Alie sang Whitney Houston’s “The Greatest love Of All” acapella. Alie blew the crowd away! Tawanna could not believe that such a big voice was coming out of her little girl. The crowd went absolutely wild for the little girl. Alie won first place. Alie was now totally certain that this was what she wanted to do. Tawanna felt obligated to find out how far Alie could go with that big voice of hers.
Tawanna started signing Alie up for every talent show that she could find. They also traveled to every state fair anywhere close to Pennsylvania. Alie came in first or second place every time. Tawanna took a small cut of the money each time Alie won one of the talent shows, she gave Alie some of the money, and she put the rest into a bank account she’d set up for Alie. Tawanna was starting to see that there could be a profit in her daughter winning the talent shows and state fair competitions. Tawanna started to look at Alie’s singing as more than a hobby. She began taking Alie out of town to compete in state fairs every single weekend. By the time Alie was 12 years old she’d already competed in at least 8 states. In Atlanta Tawanna was approached by a guy named Teddy Washngton who told her that he could make Alie a star if she would let him manage her. Tawanna was reluctant. After Alie begged her, Tawanna agreed. She signed a contract with Teddy Washington that she did not understand at all. By this time Alie was writing and performing her own original songs most of the time. The fact that Alie had performed one of her own original songs that day at the talent show in Atlanta, was the main thing that made Teddy Washington want to manage Alie. He saw the potential in her beyond her strong voice. Teddy promised to get Alie in the studio right away. Tawanna took a personal leave from her job so she could stay in Atlanta with Alie. Teddy put them up in a nice hotel and they didn’t have to pay for anything. The next day when Teddy invited them to his studio he seemed more interested in getting his hands on Alie’s books of songs she’d written than letting her get in the booth. Alie gave her book of original songs to Teddy. She also recorded one track that day. Alie and Tawanna went back to the hotel and waited for Teddy to call them when it was time to get back in the studio. He never called. Two days later Tawanna was informed by the hotel that their room wasn’t being paid for anymore and they either had to pay for the room themselves or leave. Tawanna and Alie went home to Philly. Alie was depressed for days. Tawanna felt totally responsible because she’d signed a contract and really didn’t have any idea what she was signing. Alie stopped singing and writing songs. She was totally turned off by the music industry and everything about it. About a month after returning home from Atlanta, Alie heard one of her songs on the radio. Not the track she’d done in the studio. It was one of the many songs she wrote that was in the book she gave to Teddy. Her song was being sang by five girls from Atlanta who formed a group called “The Showstoppers.” A little research showed that the group was managed by Teddy Washington. The very same Teddy Washington who had allowed Alie to record a track at his studio and had also stolen her songs. The song blew up quickly and so did “The Showstoppers.” A few weeks later Tawanna received a check from Teddy Washington for $500. Alie had earned $5000 in royalties, but there were deductions for the hotel room, studio time, and other this and thats which Tawanna did not understand. Even though she’d been burned severely by Teddy, hearing a song she’d wrote being sang on the radio had lit a fire under Alie. She began writing songs all day every day. By the time she turned 17 and graduated from high school Alie had written more songs than Tupac. Alie told Tawanna that she wasn’t going to college. Tawanna was more than disappointed. She’d been saving money for Alie’s education since the day she got her back from Shannon. Alie wanted to take her college fund and use it to start doing music again. Seriously this time. Alie had only had a run in with a shark and scheming ass person that one time in her life. Tawanna had done her best to shield her daughter from the dangers out there in the world. Alie really had no idea of what kind of people were out there waiting to take advantage of her in any way they could. At 17 years old, she thought she knew everything about the world. Tawanna knew that Alie didn’t. She also knew that Alie would be eaten alive out there in the real world. Tawanna wasn’t willing to let her daughter venture out into the real world and face the snakes alone. Tawanna quit her job and risked it all in the hope that she could help to make her daughter’s dreams come true.
With all of the things that Tawanna had been through early on in her life, she considered 17 old enough to be treated and talked to like an adult. Tawanna was only fifteen years older than her daughter. When Alie turned 17 Tawanna began treating her as an adult. In Tawanna’s eyes she was not a child anymore even though she was still and would always be her baby girl. Tawanna gave it to her raw from her perspective. She let her know that the road that they were about to travel down was going to be a rough one. She also told Alie that there was no way that she was going to make it in the business if she didn’t have thick skin. She also made Alie agree that she would listen to whatever she said with no questions asked. Being in the music industry was something that Alie really wanted to do. She agreed with whatever Tawanna said. Tawanna officially became Alie’s manager. Tawanna really had no idea what to do first, but the one thing she was sure of was that if you wanted to make it in the music industry then New York was the place that you needed to be. Tawanna and Alie packed up and headed for New York with no clear plan or strategy whatsoever. Alie bought her best friend Angelina along with her.
Tawanna, Alie, and Angelina searched for a studio in New York when they got there. They needed to find a place where Alie could record a few songs at a reasonable price. Tawanna got in touch with a so called producer who’d she met one day her and Alie were out having lunch. When he told Tawanna that he was a record producer she had Alie sing for him right there on the spot. He was impressed. He said that he was interested in helping Alie record a song. Other than saying that, he barely talked business. After he invited himself to have a seat at their table and eat lunch with them, he mostly tried to holla’ at Tawanna. He was a young guy named Slick. He was only 18 years old. Slick was closer to Alie’s age than Tawanna’s and yet, she was still who he sat here trying to holla’ at. Tawanna was a very young looking 32 years old. She could’ve easily passed for 24 or 25 years old, but she was sure that Slick had to know that she was much older than him. Tawanna was far from interested in the young man. She needed a way to get close to someone connected to the industry though. Even though Tawanna had not had sex in years, it was something that she was willing to do if it would help to get her daughter’s singing career on track. After all of the prostituting she’d done years ago sex was the last thing that had been on her mind. Tawanna was just never pressed for it. If she ever got horny she always had her dildo to help her out. Tawanna got Slick’s number and told him that she would call him in a few days. Tawanna called Slick two days later and asked him if she could come over to check out his recording studio. Slick gave her the address. Tawanna told Alie and Angelina to wait at the hotel while she went over to Slick’s studio to check things out. Tawanna fully expected that she was going to have to fuck the young man today. Tawanna hopped in a taxi and headed over to the address he gave her. The building looked raggedy from the outside, but once she got inside she found that it wasn’t as bad as it looked from first sight. It was a small studio, but it had all of the tools needed to properly and professionally record a song. Slick and five of his homies sat in there nodding their heads as they listened to music at a loud volume. Tawanna waved at Slick and smiled. Slick got up out of his seat and walked over to Tawanna.
“Why you didn’t bring your daughter with you?”
“I had to come over and check things out for myself first. I needed to see if you were the real deal.”
Slick smiled.
“Well what do you think?”
Tawanna nodded her head.
“You got a nice little set up over here. It’ll do.”
Slick nodded.
“Cool, well come over here and check this out. Tell me if you think this is something your daughter can work with.”
Slick had his homie play the beat he’d made just for Alie. He looked at Tawanna as the beat played.
“Shit fire ain’t it?”
No matter how hard she tried to, Tawanna could not hide her excitement as she listened to the beat play. This beat would be perfect for the new song that Alie just wrote. She wanted this beat for Alie new song badly. There was no way in hell that she was paying for the beat, studio time, or whatever else Slick might want to charge her for his help though…..At least not in cash.
“Yeah I like it. I gotta use the restroom real quick. Can you show me where it is?”
Slick led Tawanna down the hall to the small bathroom.
“Here it is. When you come out we can sit down and talk about which direction ya’ll might want to head in as far as production is concerned.”
Tawanna just nodded. She had no idea what the fuck he was talking about. She wasn’t even sure if he did or if he was just throwing out random words at her. The one thing she did know was that he wasn’t acting like she thought he would. Back at the restaurant he was all up on her. Now he seemed to be strictly business. She wondered if she’d read him wrong when they were at the restaurant? Was Alie the one he was really after? Did he think that she was too old? Was he even attracted to her at all? Tawanna had no idea, but there was only one way to find out. She pulled slick into the bathroom with her and kissed him passionately. Slick grabbed her by her ass as the two made their way into the small bathroom, kissing and grinding the whole time. Tawanna was sure that she would turn the youngin’ out once he got his hands on some older and experienced pussy. He was probably used to sex with girls. A grown woman like Tawanna was a whole different ball game. Tawanna was right in thinking that she could easily turn the youngin’ out. After they had sex in the bathroom, Tawanna called Alie and told her to come over to the studio. Slick helped her record two songs that day….for free. The two songs were dope too. Tawanna, Alie, and Angelina went back to Philly feeling that they’d accomplished their mission. They had two hot songs. Now all they needed to do was get them heard by the right person or people. That was six years ago……. Between that time and today they’d traveled back and forth to New York to record numerous tracks with Slick. Six years later and they were still trying to get Alie’s music heard by the right people or person who could help create some type of buzz for her.
Present Day
Alie walked out of the bathroom wearing the dress that Tawanna had laid out for her. The dress was very short and very tight. With Alie’s ass and chest poking out like crazy, the dress would definitely grab everyone’s attention. That was exactly what Tawanna was hoping for when she picked the dress out for her. Tawanna smiled at Alie as she sat on the edge of the bed drinking a glass of Hennesey.
“That’s what I’m talking about! Look at all that booty! Where she get all that ass from? SHE GET IT FROM HER MOMMA!”
Tawanna laughed as she talked very loudly. She was drunk as hell again and yelling out random phrases and song lyrics. Alie smiled even though she didn’t really want to. Her mom was getting drunk and they both needed to be on point tonight. Slick wasn’t the only person Tawanna had slept with in hopes of trying to move Alie’s career forward. She slept with radio dj’s, club dj’s, she slept with practically anyone who she thought could help Alie out in one way or another. As a matter of fact, she slept with the club promoter last week in order to get Alie her spot in the showcase that she was performing in tonight. Alie was now 22 years old and Tawanna was a 37 year old cougar. She didn’t mess with any dudes who were older than 27. Tawanna had a thing for the youngins’ because they could go all night long with no problem at all. Tawanna had her pick of the youngins’ too. She was 37, but she still had the looks of a 26 year old. People always asked if her and Alie were sisters. Tawanna never corrected them, Alie did. Alie was embarrassed that her mother was sleeping with dudes her age. Tawanna always assumed that Alie didn’t know about all of the dudes she was sleeping with. She did, and she knew that when Tawanna started drinking she got sidetracked from business and very aggressive in her pursuit of younger men. Tawanna had turned into a full blown sex addict. It wasn’t even always about money with her. It was about pleasure, and if she could help her daughter out in the process then that was an added plus. Because of the way she’d seen her mother act, Alie had never had a boyfriend for a long period of time. She was always scared that her mother, the cougar would try to get at them after awhile. Alie had no proof, but she was sure that Tawanna had fucked her last boyfriend Robbie. That feeling that she had about Tawanna and Raobbie had put a major strain on the mother/daughter relationship lately. Alie looked over at Tawanna.
“Mom why you drinking and you know how you get when you get drunk? This is my big chance. This is about my music and you gon’ go in there and act a damn fool.”
Tawanna flagged her.
“I got this. You just concentrate on singing. I got everything else.”
“I know! Everything else is the part that I’m worried about!”
Tawanna laughed. She had no idea that Alie was serious or that she was feeling some type of way because she thought Tawanna had sex with her ex-boyfriend Robbie.
The showcase was at The Armory in West Philly. This was a totally local showcase. Everyone performing tonight was an up and comer from the Philadelphia or surrounding areas. There were a bunch of local singers and rappers scheduled to perform tonight. The headlining act was a local R&B thug type singer from South Philly named Kendale. (Pronounced Ken-dial-ee) Kendale was basically a nobody in music globally, but in the city of Philadelphia he was practically an R&B God. Kendale had a major buzz in the city and it was growing daily. Alie had a while to wait until she was scheduled to perform. Thanks to Tawanna of course. She was going on right before Kendale. That was around the time that the venue would be at it’s fullest because Kendale was who most people were coming to see. That spot in the lineup came with a price. Tawanna had to have sex with the 300 pound promoter last week to secure Alie this spot in the showcase, and she owed him another blowjob tonight, which was the reason Tawanna had started drinking so early on in the night. The creepy promoter made her skin crawl. She hated the feel of his fat hands touching her body. Tawanna did it though, all for Alie. The minute they walked into the venue Tawanna told Alie that she would meet her up in the balcony in a few minutes. She told Alie that she had some last minute business to handle. Tawanna headed off to find the fat man so she could give him the blow job she owed him while Alie made her way up to the balcony. The balcony was basically like the backstage of the show. All of the artist who were waiting to perform were up there drinking and smoking. Angelina was already up there waiting for Alie. Angelina ran up to her smiling when she saw Alie coming up the stairs.
“Kendale up here!”
Alie looked around the room.
“Where?”
Angelina pointed over to the far corner of the room and Alie looked that way. The minute she did, her eyes locked with Kendale’s. He smiled and Alie nervously smiled back at him. Alie and every other twenty something year old woman in the city was infatuated with Kendale. To her, being in the same room as Kendale was like being this close to Tre Songz or Chris Brown. They were all on the same level in Alie’s eyes. Kendale had the R&B pretty boy look too. From his curly hair and green eyes down to his muscular physique. Kendale was a young woman’s dream man. Alie was a huge fan of Kendale’s. She’d been a huge fan since day one. And he’d just smiled at her! Alie couldn’t believe it. Alie almost choked when she saw him dismiss the group of chicks he was sitting with and start walking her way. Angelina smiled at Alie and giggled.
“Ooooh girl he’s coming this way! He must’ve seen that tight ass dress you got on!”
Angelina smiled and walked away. Blocking wasn’t her thing. Alie tried to grab Angelina before she walked away. She did not want to be alone with Kendale. She had no idea what to say to him. She wasn’t even sure that she would be able to speak at all when she was in his presence. It was an overwhelming thing to meet someone in person who you’d looked up to and idolized for years and years. Alie grabbed her phone from her bag and acted like she was texting someone as Kendale headed her way. She could feel her heart beating in her chest and her palms were getting sweaty. Alie was starting to feel as if she was having trouble breathing. Kendale got close to where Alie was standing and slowed down a bit as he seemed to glide across the room. He walked directly past Alie and didn’t even look at her as he did. Alie scoffed and laughed at herself.
“I’m so fuckin’ stupid for listening to Angelina! He wasn’t even thinking about me!”
Alie felt someone tap her on the shoulder and was surprised to turn around and see Kendale standing there holding two bottled waters in his hand. He smiled at her.
“If you’re talking about me you’re wrong. I was thinking about you. That’s why I grabbed you a water. It’s kind of hot up here.”
Kendale passed one of the bottled waters to Alie. She smiled nervously. She hadn’t realized that she was speaking out loud and she definitely had no idea that he was standing right behind her.
“Thank you.”
The two words was all that she could manage to say. And those little two words had taken an enormous amount of courage to get out of her mouth. Kendale extended his hand.
“I’m Kendale.”
Alie shook his hand.
“I know who you are. I know all about you too. I’m Alie by the way.”
Kendale smiled. He loved hearing that all of the pretty ladies in the city knew who he was. Kendale was the type who loved to brag, but twist it around to make it seem like he was being humble.
“Is that right? And exactly what is it that you know or have heard about me?”
“I know that you make great music and I also know that you’re a big time player.”
Kendale laughed so hard that water shot out of his mouth a little.
“Well thank you for the first part. As for the second part……I don’t know about all of that.”
Kendale was nothing like Alie thought he would be. She was expecting some tough talking, thug type of dude. He was the total opposite of what she’d thought. He was a very nice guy who was articulate with his words. Plus he seemed to be a lot more humble than she thought somebody in his position would be. The more Alie talked to Kendale the more comfortable she started to be around him. The time they spent standing there talking seemed to fly by. Before Alie knew what was happening Angelina was coming up to her telling her she needed to get ready to go on. Alie and Kendale exchanged numbers and Alie rushed off to get ready to perform.
Alie killed it when she got up on stage. The crowd was loving her too. She was only scheduled to do two songs. After seeing how the crowd responded to her and asking Kendale if it was cool, the promoters asked Alie to perform one more song. Alie was excited when she got off of the stage. It was a great feeling to see the crowd respond to her that way. Tawanna and Angelina was waiting for her when she got back to the balcony. They both rushed Alie and hugged her tightly. Alie hugged them both and smiled broadly until she heard Kendale’s voice on the microphone. His performance was starting. Alie rushed to the edge of the balcony so she could get a better look. Tawanna noticed the look in Alie’s eyes. The wheels in her brain instantly started turning. Tawanna walked over to Alie, who by now was in her own world and dreaming about what her and Kendale’s kids would look like.
“Alie you gotta get ready to get out of here.”
Alie looked at her mother like she was crazy.
“Why?”
“It’s a after party over on 8th & South Street that has probably already started and you need to get over there. There’s going to be some producers and industry people over there and you need to be there to mingle with them before all of these people leave here.”
Alie rolled her eyes.
“And what are you going to be doing while I’m on South Street mingling?”
“I got some stuff to take care of over here and then I’m going home. I can’t be out all night partying with you youngsters. Mama need sleep!”
Alie smirked. She knew her mother was lying. She probably had been off talking to some young dude earlier and was probably going to creep off with him tonight. Alie didn’t care though. She was kind of glad. Alie was sure that if there was an after party going down tonight then Kendale was definitely going to be there. And even though one night stands wasn’t really her thing, she was more than sure that she was going to fuck Kendale tonight when he came thru the after party. Alie hugged Tawanna and her and Angelina headed off down the stairs. Tawanna watched them walk down the stairs and then walked over to the edge of the balcony. She looked down at Kendale who was now on the stage out of his shirt and pants and performing in his boxers. Tawanna smiled and licked her lips. Just like Alie, she also planned on sampling Kendale tonight.
When Kendale saw Tawanna in the balcony after he performed he didn’t stand a chance. He called himself scooping her up when in reality that was the total opposite of what was really going down. Tawanna took Kendale to the hotel and tried to suck and fuck the life out of him. Even though Tawanna was enjoying her sexcapade with the young man, she was here on a mission. She was going to try to get Kendale to do a duet with Alie. She couldn’t just come right out and say it after having sex with him though. That would make her motive for sleeping with him much too obvious. She figured that she would have sex with the youngin’ a few more times to make sure that he was pussywhipped before she approached him about it. But tonight had definitely been a win for Tawanna and the home team. The seeds to her big plan had been planted.
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Alie was disappointed that Kendale didn’t come to the after party after the show was over. He had not called her either. After two days Alie decided to make the first move and give him a call. She really wasn’t expecting much. She was pretty sure that he’d probably forgotten who she was, but she figured it was still worth a try. Alie gave Kendale a call around 2:00 pm. Things did not go how she expected them to. He remembered exactly who she was. He said he had not called her yet because he’d been in the studio working constantly. Kendale said he was about to take a break for a while. He asked Alie if he could come pick her up so that they could have a late lunch date and talk a little bit. Alie told him that she would meet him somewhere. She wasn’t into letting everyone know where she lived right off the bat. Alie lived alone and she tried to protect herself the best she could. Alie agreed to meet Kendale for lunch in Center City. Alie was surprised when he suggested they have lunch at The Four Seasons Hotel. She had some fond memories of that place. Alie’s ex-boyfriend Robbie used to work here and the two had spent many weekends at the hotel together. Alie made her way to the hotel’s lobby where the bar was located. The first thing she did when she walked into the place was to look around and see if Robbie still worked here. As she looked around she spotted Kendale. When he saw her he stood up and waved. Kendale watched as Alie switched her way over to his table. He smiled at her as she sat down.
“Damn! You’re looking mighty good today.”
Alie smiled.
“Thank you.”
“So you always look like this?”
“Like what?”
“Like you’re trying to win a competition for tightest fitting dress ever.”
Alie laughed.
“Naw. Not at all. I was at home in a pair of sweatpants when you called. I’m a jeans and Jordans type of chick but you can’t wear that everywhere.”
Kendale nodded. Alie was definitely his type of female. She was pretty and down to earth at the same time. That equaled up to a dime in Kendale’s book. He was more than sure that Alie would be a great catch for him. He wanted more than just sex from her. He was hoping that she was going to be wifey. Kendale and Alie ordered lunch and talked about any and everything. Alie was in awe of Kendale and every little thing he did, even though she tried to play it cool. After lunch they went walking around Center City and talking some more. This was a day that neither one of them wanted to end. Alie was a little pissed off that Kendale’s phone kept ringing every two minutes. She wanted to get upset or say something, but she knew it was a little too early in the dating phase to show him how crazy she really was. Alie played it cool and acted as if she didn’t notice. As night time approached Kendale walked Alie back to her car. The two embraced and shared a long goodnight kiss. Alie got inside of her car and drove off. Before she was even three blocks away she was texting him already.
Kendale laughed as he looked at the text Alie sent him. He sent her back a bunch of heart emojis. Alie was a dope ass chick. One he definitely planned on building something long term with, but right now he was thinking about getting his dick sucked and doing some very nasty things to someone he did not respect as much as Alie. Kendale searched through his phone and dialed Tawanna’s number. She’d been texting him the whole time that he was with Alie. Kendale figured he might as well go over to see her and get some more of that bomb ass head.
CHAPTER-2
The Hustler
Dave sat back bobbing his head as he listened to Kendale in the booth working on his latest track. The joint was nice and all, but it was lacking that umph that a big time hit needed in order to take off. Dave was Kendale’s ol’ hea and his manager. Dave was 42 years old and had seen it all during his time in the streets. After doing ten years in the bing behind a drug trafficking conviction Dave decided to take a different route to make his money when he came home. He bought a few laundromats and corner Deli’s in the hood. He also decided to back Kendale in the music biz. Kendale’s older brother Kwame was Dave’s partner in crime back in ’02 before he was shot and killed while sitting in his car in a Mcdonalds drive thru. Dave took it upon himself to become Kendale’s older brother after Kwame’s murder. Kendale looked up to Dave. He always had. Even back when Kwame was still alive. Everything about Dave was gangsta’ and he never seemed to make any bad business decisions, legal or illegal. Dave may have done 10 years for drug trafficking, but the FEDS did not find one dollar of the millions of dollars he had stashed away when they raided his many houses. He never told them where it was at either. Even though Dave did his time and had been out of trouble since he came home, he was sure that he was still on the FEDS radar. Dave refused to ever go back to the bing. He kept his nose as clean as possible, but if push came to shove, it was a known fact to everyone who knew him that Dave wasn’t going to be taken alive. He was holding court in the street this time around. He said that every day and he truly meant it. Dave lit up a blunt and hit the intercom button so Kendale could hear him from inside the booth.
“Aye K come on out for a minute.”
Kendale nodded and took the headphones off. He walked out of the booth and headed over to where Dave was sitting behind the controls.
“What’s up ol’ head?”
Dave passed the blunt to Kendale.
“This track is dope, but it’s missing something.”
Kendale nodded.
“I was thinking the same thing. So what you got in mind?”
Dave rubbed his beard and thought about it for a minute.
“I think it would be dope if it was a female singing the hook instead of you.”
Dave looked at Kendale to see how he would react to hearing this. Kendale was a lot different than most artist these days. He absolutely hated working with someone else. He never wanted anyone to overshadow him on any song. That was the reason he never worked with anyone else. Working alone was the very thing that had got him so much attention in the first place. Ironically, that was probably the very thing that was preventing him from blowing up the way that he should. Kendale looked at Dave like he was crazy.
“Have someone else sing my hook? Naw bruh, that’s definitely a no-go.”
Dave sighed.
“We’ve been doing things your way for a long time and not seeing the results we want. Don’t you think it’s about time you try something else?”
Kendale shook his head.
“Nope. That ain’t me man. I ain’t with all the industry dick eating shit. I’m trying to come up from the muscle. If I fall on my face I’m going to do it like a man.”
This was the thing about Kendale that Dave couldn’t stand. He was 24 years old and thought that he knew everything about the world and how things operated. That shit got Dave hot under the collar every time. Dave composed himself before he spoke.
“The one thing that you fail to realize about the music industry is that it was here before you and it’s going to be here after you. The music industry don’t need you, you need it. Things have been going the same way in the industry since forever. The music industry ain’t one of them industries that you can get somewhere by not fuckin’ with people. This is a “you scratch my back, I’ll scratch your back” business. You ain’t gotta be friends with niggas, but you will have to make some acquaintances in this bitch if you think you’re going to get anywhere.”
Kendale sat back and thought about what Dave just said. He knew that he was right. That didn’t mean that Kendale was willing to share his shine with just anybody though. If he did have to share his shine with someone, then it was definitely going to be someone he fucked with like that.
Alie came haul assing out of the bathroom like the house was on fire when she heard her phone ringing. She’d been in the shower. She didn’t even bother to wrap a towel around herself or anything. She almost busted her ass as she ran through the hallway to her bedroom where her cell phone was at. Alie was anticipating one person’s call. When she saw Kendale’s name on the caller ID she damn near had a heart attack. Alie caught her breath before she put on her casual, sexy voice and answered the phone.
“Hey.”
“Hey what’s up. What you was doing?”
“Nothing. Just got home from work. I was about to get in the shower.”
Alie lied as she watched water drip from her naked body onto her bedroom floor. She laughed at herself in her head and continued.
“Why you ask?”
“I was wondering if you could come down to the studio for a little while tonight. I’m recording this new track and I wanted to know if you would do the hook for me?”
Alie was hyped, but she tried to remain cool.
“I can do that.”
“That’s what’s up! I’ll see you when you get here.”
“Alright I’ll see you then.”
Alie ended the call and looked at her phone. She could not believe that Kendale wanted her on a track with him. This could not have worked out any better for her if she’d written this story herself. Alie decided that it would probably be a good idea to run the situation at hand by her mom. She was going to do the track regardless of what Tawanna said. She just thought that since she was her manager, she should at least let her know what was going on. Alie dialed Tawanna’s number. The call immediately went to voicemail. Alie sighed.
“She probably somewhere getting fucked by a nigga that’s young enough to be her son right now!”
Alie shook her head and decided not to leave a message for her mom. She would just catch up to her later. Alie headed back to the shower, practicing her vocals as she pranced down the hall.
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“You finished?”
Tawanna looked over her shoulder as she held onto the side of the desk she was bent over on. She was doing what she does best again. Trying to fuck as many people as she could in order to get her daughter to the top. This time her target was Domingo. Tawanna had known Domingo for a while. He used to own the corner store down the street from Shannon’s house back when Tawanna lived there as a teenager. Domingo was at least in his late 20’s back then. That never stopped him from trying to get with the then 14 year old Tawanna every time she walked into his store, which was practically every day. He was an old ass pervert back then and he was an older even more perverted man now. So it was no big surprise that when he came home from prison for selling drugs out of his store, he started a porn company. After years of making good money in the porn industry Domingo was looking to make more money. His porn company was known world wide. He was now trying to branch off into something a little less vulgar in the hopes of getting a more mainstream audience and much more money. Domingo started a magazine. His magazine featured up and coming rappers and beautiful half naked young women. The magazine blew up quickly and just as he’d hoped, helped to garner him a more mainstream audience. Tawanna ran into Domingo at the car wash the other day. He told her about his business as they both waited in the halls of the car wash for their cars to come down the conveyor. When Domingo’s Rolls Royce came rolling down the conveyor Tawanna knew right then that she was going to fuck him. When Domingo began talking about his magazine, she knew she was going to fuck him and get some free promotion for Alie out of it.
“Yeah I’m done.”
Domingo breathed heavily as he pulled his pants up and smacked Tawanna on the ass. He was smiling from ear to ear. The thought of fucking Tawanna had got him through some lonely nights in solitary confinement back when he was in prison. The real thing was just as good as he imagined it would be all of those years ago. Domingo flexed as he looked at himself in the mirror. He obviously couldn’t see it, but the charming boyish looks he once had were long gone. These days he was looking more like a much older version of Sylvester Stallone than the younger version of Antonio Banderas that he still thought he looked like. Tawanna shook her head and laughed to herself as she looked at this old fool. She pulled her dress down from her back before she walked off to the small bathroom that Domingo had inside his office. She took a bird bath while she was in there. Tawanna fixed her clothes and hair before she walked out of the bathroom. Now that the unpleasantness was over with it was time to get down to some business. Tawanna took a seat in the chair on the opposite side of Domingo’s desk and crossed her legs.
“I want my daughter on the cover of this month’s issue of your magazine.”
Domingo had just got finished having sex with her less than ten minutes ago and he still couldn’t manage to keep his eyes off of Tawanna’s body. He was so busy trying to look up her dress that he heard none of what she just said. He snapped out of his trance when he heard her calling his name.
“What you talking about? What you say?”
Tawanna shook her head. She hated repeating herself. Knowing that she was going to have to was pissing her off right now, but the fact that Domingo sounded like Tony Montana everytime he opened his mouth made her laugh on the inside. She politely smiled as she spoke.
“I said I want my daughter on the cover of your magazine this month.”
Domingo shook his head emphatically.
“Why? Because you gave me some pussy? That ain’t have shit to do with business, that was pleasure. And I’m paying for that.”
Domingo pulled two wads of money out of the drawer and sat it on top of the desk.
“10k good for you?”
Tawanna put her nose in the air and balled up her face like she was being disrespected. She still grabbed the money and put it in her pocketbook though.
“And why ain’t my daughter worthy of being on the cover of your magazine?”
“That’s simple. It’s because she ain’t got enough juice! Don’t nobody know who the hell your daughter is, not even me. I need people with a following on the covers of my mag.”
“My daughter got 50k followers on Instagram and another 30k on Twitter. Not to count the 5k on Facebook. My daughter got a following.”
Domingo laughed at her.
“That’s a good start, but that’s not a following. I’m talking about millions of people.”
“She bout to blow up and you’re gonna kick yourself in the ass for not jumping on this opportunity when you had the chance!”
Tawanna stood up and began to storm out of the office. Domingo watched her ass shake as she walked away. He needed some more of that!
“Hey Tawanna, let me see what your daughter look like.”
Tawanna turned around.
“What you want me to do? Go and get her?”
“You’re her mother. I’m sure you have a picture of your child in your cell phone.”
She did. Tawanna looked through her phone and searched for the latest picture of Alie that she could find. It just so happened to be the pic Tawanna took of her before they went to the show at the Armory. The night Alie wore the very tight dress that she had picked out for her. Tawanna passed Domingo her phone after she took a look at the pic. He examined the picture and then looked at Tawanna. Domingo reached into his desk for his glasses and put them on. He looked at the phone again before he looked up at Tawanna.
“Is this you or your daughter?”
Tawanna laughed.
“You know damn well that ain’t me, but thanks for the compliment. That’s my babygirl Alie.”
In his mind, Domingo still saw Tawanna as the teenage girl from years ago. For some reason, he’d always assumed that when she spoke of her daughter she was talking about a 13 year old teenie bopper or something. Seeing this picture of Alie had changed his whole mindset.
“I’ll tell you what. I’ll give your daughter the cover under a few conditions.”
Tawanna frowned as she prepared to listen to Domingo give his demands.
“Number one, I need her to share the cover with my wife’s nephew. He’s a rapper out of the Bronx New York. Number two, I want to do a photoshoot with your daughter for my site. And number three, I want you whenever I call you for a month straight.”
Tawanna flagged him and snatched her phone from his hands.
“You must be out of your gotdamn mind if you think I’m signing my daughter up to be on a damn porn site! I should slap the shit outta you for even suggesting some dumb ass shit like that!”
Domingo shook his head.
“The photoshoot is not for a porn site. It’s for my new dating app. It has nothing to do with porn. The photoshoot is strictly for advertising purposes only.”
Tawanna sat back and thought about it. Alie wasn’t going to like this one bit and she knew it. Tawanna sat there trying to figure out a way to get Alie to believe in that old saying. “All publicity is good publicity.” She was more than sure that Alie was going to resist wholeheartedly, but the manager inside of Tawanna was telling her that this was going to be a good idea that was going to help Alie gain some recognition. Plus Tawanna was sure that she was just a few more sex sessions with Kendale away from getting him to work with Alie. Tawanna convinced herself that she was doing the right thing for Alie’s career by accepting Domingo’s deal and terms of agreement. Domingo had his secretary write up a contract right away. Tawanna signed the contract and got another $10,000 out of Domingo as an advance on the work to be done, only after he reminded her that they were under contract and if she didn’t fulfill her end of the bargain he would be coming after her to get his advance money back. Once again Tawanna agreed. She stood up and began to head out of Domingo’s office. He called her back.
“You forgot about the other part of the deal already? I need my face sat on right now.”
Domingo laid on his back on top of the desk. Tawanna sighed. She turned around and headed back towards the desk so she could go sit on his old ass face right quick. In her mind she was thinking that Alie better appreciate all of the shit she did for her.
CHAPTER-3
Betrayed
Alie sat in the restaurant nervously texting away as she waited for her mother to arrive. She was nervous about telling Tawanna that she’d done a track with Kendale. It started off with him just wanting her to sing the hook. After being in the studio for a while kendale’s manager suggested that they make the song into a duet and sing it together. Alie was the one who rearranged the song and practically re-wrote the whole damn thing. She transformed Kendale’s lackluster song into a beautiful duet. She’d done the song without signing any paperwork or anything. Kendale was in a position to do whatever he wanted to with the track. If he was to mess around and make a million dollars off of her work, he didn’t legally owe her anything. She had no paperwork or agreement of any kind. She probably wouldn’t even be able to take him to court if that was something she wanted to do. After what happened to Alie back in Atlanta when she was younger Tawanna had told her to never do anything until they had a chance to read the contract over with their lawyer. Alie had no contract. She knew Tawanna was going to be beyond pissed off. Alie sat there hoping that Tawanna had not started drinking yet today. Alie smiled as she watched the two white men sitting at the table next to hers practically break their necks to get a look at the beautiful woman making her way into the restaurant. Alie knew that Tawanna was coming her way before she even saw her mom. Tawanna walked over to Alie’s table and hugged her daughter.
“Hey bookie!”
Tawanna stepped back and shook her head as she looked at Alie in her sweatshirt and sweatpants. Alie’s hair was tied up into a neat ponytail.
“It’s like you ain’t even trying to get a man Alie.”
Tawanna was only joking and Alie knew it. She also knew that Tawanna halfway meant it for real too. Alie sucked her teeth and laughed.
“For your information, I do got a man!”
Tawanna looked at her with surprise clearly showing on her face.
“Since when? Who?”
Alie laughed.
“None of your business nosy! You’ll meet him when the time is right.”
Tawanna nodded and sat down. Alie sat down on the other side of the table. Tawanna took a deep breath before she spoke.
“Babygirl I got some news for you. I got some news that you’re gonna love and some news that you’re gonna hate. Which one you want first?”
Alie thought about it for a minute before she answered.
“I’m having a great day right now and I don’t need you spoiling my day right away. Give me the good news first.”
Tawanna reached into her pocketbook and pulled out an envelope. She placed it on the table and slid it over to Alie.
“I got you the cover of a magazine and they’re paying you. This is $9000 advance money. I took my 10% off top already.”
Alie grabbed the envelope and looked inside suspiciously.
“Of course you did. Why the hell would someone pay me $10,000 to be on the cover of their magazine? I’m not important.”
“It’s 20 actually. You got 10 more coming, but that’s where the bad news comes in at. An old friend of mine owns the magazine. This will be good exposure for you. He owns a porn company and…..”
Alie flipped out when she heard the word porn.
“REALLY MOM? Fuckin’ porn! You’ll do anything for a damn dollar! Don’t try to turn me into a damn thot without me knowing about it! If you want somebody to do some porn then you do it your damn self!”
Alie stood up and stormed out of the restaurant. She went from 0-100 without even allowing Tawanna to fully explain the situation. Tawanna sat alone at the table and shook her head. She would give Alie a few days to cool off before she approached her about this again. No matter how much she hated to, she was going to do this photoshoot rather she liked it or not. Even if Tawanna had to physically drag her down there! Tawanna had already signed the contract and taken the advance money that she was not giving back. Tawanna wasn’t really worried about it. She sat back and ordered a drink. She figured she might as well have a few while she was here. Tawanna caught a glimpse of the two white businessmen sitting at the next table who were watching her every move. They both looked to be around mid 20’s or early 30’s and they both looked like they had some money. Tawanna turned to the gentlemen and smiled.
“Either one of you gentlemen trying to buy a drink for a lady?”
The two men practically trampled each other trying to get out of their seats so they could go sit next to Tawanna.
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Alie left the restaurant steaming mad. The nerve of her mother trying to sign her up for some damn porn! Alie truly believed that her mother would do anything for a dollar. Even try to sell her own daughter! Alie noticed Tawanna’s love for money a long time ago. Alie always tried her hardest to be the exact opposite of her mother for that reason alone. It was the exact reason that she’d been working as a customer service representative at the cable company for the last three years. She didn’t make lots of money, but she was making her money with some sense of class, unlike Tawanna who seemed to trick or scheme for every dollar that she earned. Her mom had a nice car, nice condo, and other nice things, but where was her dignity? Alie drove down the street thinking nothing but bad thought about her scandalous ass mother. She was headed to Angelina’s house. Alie needed someone to talk to right now and Angelina was always available whenever she needed a shoulder to cry on. As Alie drove to Angelina’s house she got a call from Kendale. Alie really wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone other than Angelina right now. She looked at her phone and sighed. Alie answered the phone and tried not to let the attitude she had right now show.
“Hey.”
“What’s up shorty. You sound a little down. Did I catch you at a bad time or something?”
“Not really. I just got finished having an argument with my mom about something.”
Alie talked and Kendale listened. She told him that she had a big argument with her mom, but she left out the part of what the argument was about. Kendale didn’t interrupt her as she went on her little rant, he just listened. Without even realizing it Alie found herself asking him what she should do. Kendale told her that life was too short to be mad at her mom and not speaking to her because they had an argument. He reminded her that we all are only blessed with one mother. And how short life really is, and the fact that we never know how much time we have on this earth with our loved ones. What Kendale said made perfect sense to Alie. She started thinking that maybe she should apologize to her mother for blowing up at her the way she did. She knew she should have listened to everything Tawanna said first. The more that Alie thought about it, the more she was sure that her mother would never ask her to do something as degrading as porn. Alie even laughed at the idea now. She felt that she’d definitely overreacted. Alie called Tawanna’s number to apologize to her. Tawanna didn’t answer her phone. Alie planned to go see her later on tonight after she had a few drinks and turned up with Angelina.
After hours of drinking with Angelina and two of her homegirls, Alie was tipsy. She jumped in her car and headed for Tawanna’s Chestnut Hill condo. Alie knew that she really shouldn’t be driving in this condition, but she felt that she was cool enough to make it to her mom’s crib safely. She planned on crashing on her mom’s couch as soon as she got there. Alie managed to make it to her mom’s condo without wrecking her car. She caught the elevator up to the 11th floor and walked down the hall to Tawanna’s unit. Alie put her key in the lock and opened the door. She was taken aback as soon as she looked inside. She wondered why Kendale was standing in her mother’s living room with no shirt on. As she looked down she found out why. Tawanna was on her knees sucking Kendale off like a Hoover Vaccum Cleaner. Alie locked eyes with Kendale and she raced out of the condo. Alie ran to the elevator crying uncontrollably and feeling sick to her stomach.
CHAPTER-4
Out With The Old
Alie laid in her bed looking at the ceiling as Angelina tried to feed her soup. After seeing her mother performing a sexual act on someone she thought was her boyfriend Alie was physically sick. It was one thing to think her mom was doing stuff, but to actually see it was more than she could handle. Alie had been laid up in the bed for three days straight. Angelina had come over the first night and stayed with Alie. She never left her side as Alie cried and cried. Alie felt as if this was the end of the world. She didn’t want to do anything. Angelina looked at her friend in pain as she tried to put a spoonful of soup in her mouth like she was a baby.
“Just try a little bit. You gotta eat something.”
Alie rolled her eyes at Angelina. She wasn’t mad at her, she was just mad at the world right now. Alie sighed. She was certain that Angelina wasn’t going to leave her alone until she ate some. Alie swallowed the spoonful of soup. Angelina smiled. She was already putting more soup on the spoon. Alie sighed again. She reached for her remote control and changed the channel on the tv. The news had been on tv all day. The news was so depressing. It definitely was not going to help her get out of the funk she was in. Someone was always getting shot, or killed, and now this Ebola shit was spreading everywhere like wildfire. Watching the news was enough to make a person want to off themselves. The world was clearly about to end any day now. Alie turned the channel to “TVone.” They were showing reruns of “Martin” as usual. Her favorite episode was on too. The one when Martin went to LA to be on the Vernell Hill Show. Alie laughed her ass off as she watched Martin acting a damn fool. Before Alie realized what had happened, she’d taken the bowl of soup out of Angelina’s hands and eaten the whole thing. After watching reruns of Martin for two hours Alie forgot all about being sick. She still knew why she’d been feeling bad, but a good laugh made her realize it wasn’t the end of the world. She’d cried her eyes out about it already and now it was time to get back to chasing this paper and her dreams. Everything was looking clearer to Alie now and she knew exactly what she needed to do. She reached over on the bed for her cell phone.
Your services are no longer needed. I have a new manager.
It was a simple text and straight to the point. Alie was feeling twenty times better after she sent the text to Tawanna. She smiled at Angelina.
“You want to be my new manager?”
Angelina was shocked.
“Managaer? I don’t know nothing about being a manager.”
Alie smiled at her.
“Neither did my mom.”
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Kendale was feeling almost as bad as Alie about this whole thing. He’d been trying to call and text her since that night. She never answered the phone or texted him back. He couldn’t really say that he was surprised about that. He was sure that he would have felt the same way if he’d walked in on his girlfriend having sex with his dad……or his mom for that matter. Alie had every right to be pissed off, but he felt that her anger was misplaced. He was truly innocent in all of this mess. He had no idea that Tawanna was Alie’s mom. Hell, he was still having trouble wrapping his mind around the fact that Tawanna had a child as old as Alie. He always assumed that Tawanna was in her mid to late Twenties. Kendale drove over to his ol’ head Dave’s house out Southwest Philly to get some type of advice on what he should do, or just see what he might have to say about the situation. Kendale and Dave passed a blunt back and forth as Kendale told Dave about his woman problems. Dave didn’t say anything or show any emotion as he listened to Kendale talk. When Kendale finished talking Dave sat back and looked at him. Two seconds later he bust out laughing.
“Dawg! How the fuck you smash your babe mom man?”
Kendale shook his head as Dave laughed at him.
“The fucked up part is that I ain’t even know until Tawanna told me. And that was after the fact. If you saw Alie and Tawanna standing next to each other you would think that they were sisters or something.”
Dave thought about what Kendale just said and stopped laughing.
“Is her mom bad though?”
“Hell yeah she bad! I just told you that her and Alie could pass for sisters.”
“You still gon be fuckin’ Ma Dukes?”
“Naw I’m done with that. I’m tryna get my shorty back.”
Dave thought about it for a minute before he spoke.
“Well then it’s two things you’re gonna need to do. The first thing is do something with that music you and Alie made together. You can use that as an excuse to want to see her again. She’ll probably come thru to see you if it’s about music. The other thing is put my bid in with Ma Dukes! I’m tryna see what that thang is hittin’ for!”
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Show at 17th & Chestnut 2nite. Make sure the dj got the music & erything is good 2 go- see u when I get there
Alie sat her phone down on the bed after she sent the text to Angelina. As she searched her closet for something to wear tonight she thought about Tawanna. This was her specialty right here. She may be a lot of things, but Alie knew that her mother knew fashion and what should be worn to which events. This was a show in a small club that Alie was doing tonight, but there was always the chance of being seen by someone important in the biz. Alie wanted things to be perfect every time she performed. No matter how big or small the venue was. Alie wondered if Angelina would be able to handle things as well as Tawanna did. Surely it couldn’t be too hard if Tawanna usually handled things while she was drunk as hell. Alie shook the thought off. She put her insecurities about if her best friend would be able to handle the job to the side. Alie went back to searching inside of her closet for something to wear tonight. She tried to get in the mind of her momma as she searched for the smallest and tightest outfit that she could find.
Alie jumped in a taxi and headed over to the club. She was surprised to see a pretty nice sized crowd formed outside waiting to get in. This was a pleasant surprise. Alie walked inside the club excited about the night ahead and in a great mood. Her mood changed the minute she walked over to the dj and asked him if he had her track ready. He informed her that he didn’t have her music. He said that no one had given it to him and it was much too late to give it to him now. They had a schedule in place that could not be re-arranged. Alie couldn’t believe this. Angelina only had one job to do and she couldn’t even manage to do that. It showed a total lack of proffessionalism on Angelina’s part. Alie began thinking about the old saying “friends and businees don’t mix.” Alie wondered if she’d made a horrible career decision by hiring Angelina as her manager. As Alie stood there thinking, Angelina came running up to her breathing heavily.
“Where’s the d.j? I gotta get your music to him before it’s too late!”
Alie shook her head.
“It’s already too late.”
“Why?”
Alie looked at Angelina like she was crazy.
“What time did you get here?”
“Five minutes ago. I made it on time. It’s still time for me to give him your music. I don’t know why you’re saying it’s too late.”
Alie shook her head again. Angelina truly did not understand how things worked.
“They have a schedule and a program that they make out hours before the club even opens. You were supposed to submit the music to him by 5:00 pm. Six at the latest.”
“Ooooh I didn’t even know that.”
Alie was upset, but she knew that this was really her own fault. She should have explained things to Angelina step by step. Because of the fact that Tawanna usually handled these kinds of things with ease, Alie had taken for granted that these kinds of things were common knowledge and was something everyone automatically knew. This mix-up was totally her own fault and she knew it.
“Don’t worry about it. We’ll get it together some kind of way. You are going to have to learn how to take some initiative though because not only did I miss some money tonight, you did too. As my manager you get 10% of all show money and money from deals that you set up.”
Angelina nodded. This little piece of information had put things into a brand new perspective for her. 10% was definitely something to look forward to. If she played her cards right and made a few power moves, she might be able to afford to quit her dumb ass job at Target in a year or two. Angelina knew that she was going to need to learn how to navigate the game and make some shit happen quickly. If Alie would fire her own mother, then Angelina was sure that Alie would fire her in a heartbeat. Anyone who owned a working pair of ears could hear that Alie’s voice was going to take her very far in the music industry. Angelina planned on being right by her side and collecting her 10% when that happened. Angelina even went so far as to begin plotting what type of moves she was going to make beyond that. She figured that if she made enough of the right connections along the way, she might be able to start her own management company one day. The job of being Alie’s manager had suddenly become very important to Angelina and her future plans.
CHAPTER-5
Searching For A Come Up
Kendale looked on as the number of views on the Youtube video rose every minute. The numbers had been steadily rising since he’d put it up yesterday afternoon. It was now 10:00am the next morning and the number of views had not slowed down one bit. It wasn’t even a video. It was just audio of the track that him and Alie did, with both of their pictures showing on the screen. Kendale couldn’t believe what he was seeing. His very best hit never blew up like this. Not only were the views rising uncontrollably on Youtube, the video was showing up all over Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram also. Kendale sat back and laughed.
“So this is what going viral means?”
It definitely was. This shit was spreading across the internet faster that a video of a cute little kitten playing the piano. Kendale sat back and contemplated where to go from here. As he sat in his living room smoking weed his phone rang. Kendale looked to see who was calling and quickly answered.
“What up O.G.”
It was Dave on the other end of the line and his voice was full of excitement.
“Aye you seen the Youtube numbers yet!?”
“Yeah I’m looking at the shit right now. This shit is crazy bruh!”
“Now ain’t you glad that you listened to me when I told you to do something with that track?”
“Yeah but Alie still won’t take my calls. I ain’t even sure if she knows I put the jawn up yet.”
“Don’t worry about that right now. We gotta get moving on this music shit while we got the momentum. We gotta get this shit on Soundcloud and WorldStar Hip Hop, and we definitely gotta do an official video for this jawn. We gon ned to put a rush job on the video too! Aye, who is Alie’s manager?”
Kendale paused for a minute. He really wanted to be with Alie. He also really didn’t want Dave anywhere near Tawanna. That was a good piece of ass that he wanted to keep to himself for as long as he possibly could. Kendale truly wanted to have his cake and eat it too. Kendale knew Dave’s reputation for being a sucker for love type of dude. He was sure that if Dave smashed Tawanna he was going to fall in love with her. If that happened he wouldn’t be able to smash whenever he wanted to anymore.
“Her mom is her manager.”
“Give me her number. I’m a hit her up right now and set something up. Business is business, your boo thang Alie gonna have to get out of her fuckin’ feelings. We got work to do!”
Kendale gave Dave Tawanna’s number and ended the call. All of a sudden Kendale’s thoughts had switched from Alie to Tawanna and how good the pussy was. He shook his head and refreshed his Youtube page. The video now had well over a million views. Kendale smiled.
“Fuck Tawanna she ain’t the only chick out there with good pussy! This business is more important. I don’t care if Dave hit it or not.”
Kendale said these words out loud in the hope that he could convince himself that this was true. In the inside he was singing a whole different tune. The tune he sang was “I HOPE HE DON’T GET IT!”
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Angelina stood in the deli waiting for her cheesesteak to finish getting cooked at Max’s on Broad & Erie Avenue. She was deep in thought. She needed to come up with some kind of major move to make Alie see that she needed her before Alie messed around and fired her like she did her mother. Angelina had not got any better at being Alie’s manager in the last couple of weeks. Damn near everything that Alie was paying her to do, Alie did herself even though she still paid Angelina basically for doing nothing. Angelina felt like Alie would surely see that she was paying her for nothing pretty soon and cut her loose. Angelina couldn’t afford for that to happen. Being Alie’s manager was her ticket to rubbing shoulders with important people in the biz, and eventually starting her own management company. Angelina was startled out of her deep thoughts when she felt someone tap her on the shoulder. She turned around to see Tawanna smiling at her. Angelina quickly composed herself and smiled.
“Hey! I didn’t even see you walking up. You scared the hell out of me.”
Tawanna laughed at her.
“You thought you was about to get robbed huh? What you doing in North Philly?”
“I was about to go see somebody. I stopped in here to get something to eat.”
“Oh. You talk to Alie lately?”
Angelina wasn’t sure what to say. She didn’t know if Alie had told her mother that she was now her new manager or not. The last thing Angelina wanted to be was in the middle of some damn family drama that she had nothing to do with. Angelina decided that it was best to assume that Tawanna had no idea that she was Alie’s new manager.
“Yeah I talked to her earlier today.”
“Are you going to see her today?”
“Most likely I will. Do you want me to tell her something?”
Tawanna wasn’t sure if she should let Angelina in on her business, but Alie wasn’t answering her calls. There were things that needed to get done. Tawanna didn’t have time for the dumb ass games right now.
“Tell her that we’re still contractually obligated to do that photoshoot for my friend. The shoot is set up for 1:00 pm next Tuesday at 128 N Broad Street. And ask her if she knows that Kendale got their song up on Youtube? Kendale gonna have to come up off of some money. My daughter ain’t singing for free! I don’t know what the hell he thinking he tryna pull, but it ain’t happening. He gon make my lawyer earn his money if he keep playing with mine! I ain’t the one for the dumb shit!”
Angelina wrote down the address for the photoshoot and listened as Tawanna went on her mini rant. Angelina told Tawanna that she would give Alie the message for her. Angelina watched Tawanna walk away as she pondered her next move. This might be the come up that she’d been looking for. Kendale was connected. He didn’t have a record deal right now, but he did have one before he got dropped from the label. That meant that Kendale had to know some people. Angelina was sure that if she met up with Kendale and did some politicking that she could talk her way into getting him to introduce her to one of his industry connects. This was a business where everyone used everybody in order to help move themselves forward. Angelina knew that she was going to need to learn how to craftily play this game if she was ever going to get anywhere. She was going to tell Alie about the photoshoot that Tawanna said she was supposed to do, however, she was going to handle that other piece of business with Kendale herself.
Tawanna laughed to herself as she walked out of Max’s. What the fuck was Alie thinking? Tawanna already knew that Angelina was working as Alie’s new manager even though Angelina didn’t know that she knew. Was she really dumb enough to think that anything that had to do with Alie’s career could move without her knowing about it? This was one of the times that sleeping with the many dudes connected to the industry had actually paid off. Club owners around the city had been calling Tawanna and asking her if she was still Alie’s manager, because some chick named Angelina had came through their spot trying to book Alie and claiming to be her manager. Tawanna’s club owner friends were loyal to Tawanna. They would do anything for her for the chance that they could possibly get another round of sex with her. Tawanna used every connection she had to make it difficult for Alie to get booked to perform anywhere in the city. When Tawanna was her manager Alie was doing shows at the bigger clubs in the city. After Tawanna made a few calls, the only bookings that Alie was getting was at small clubs and local bars. Alie was getting paid very little to perform and sometimes she was performing for free or club and bar perks. Tawanna was going to make Alie come crawling back to her and begging her to be her manager again. Angelina was not going to last a long time being Alie’s manager. Especially after this power move that Tawanna planned on laying down next.
STRAIGHT SCANDALOUS by Kareem Rahman 300 pages, 21 Chapters..You can purchase the full book in paperback right here for $7.50/ free shipping! (Limited quantities available at this price!) Thank you for supporting self-published authors!
Straight Scandalous by Kareem Rahman paperback book
When money becomes the motivation, people tend to become STRAIGHT SCANDALOUS paperback edition – 300 pages
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